IELTSNetwork.com

Looks like a good essay to me. The only suggestion would be to try replacing the overused word "toys" with some more specific toys types such us LEGO, Action figures, Puzzles, Model cars, Dolls.

I think instead of "Some people, ... However" in introduction paragraph, it's better to use something like "While some people think..., there are quite a few opponents to this idea.". It makes the sentence easier to read and also eliminates repetition of "some people". ...

You recently made reservations for dinner at a very famous and expensive restaurant in town. However, the meal and the service were terrible. The restaurant manager was not available to solve the problem, so you left without a resolution. Write an email to the restaurant's manager in about 150-200 ...

It looks really good in terms of vocabulary and task achievement, however, I feel that the weakest point of the letter would be cohesion or usage of appropriate linking words. As I can see, most of the sentences start with "I", which sounds a bit mechanical: I did this, I did that... Thoug...

Feel you, just do more practicing and try to get some help from qualified teachers.

That's actually a good point, I also find myself recomposing a sentence quite often when I'm typing, and when I do writing it takes way more time to erase and write a sentence again following the typing habit. Also, when I see a clear type font it's easier to notice any mistake. I'd suggest consider...

Hi, I'm really glad that finally somebody brought up the question of digitizing preparation for IELTS. I personally feel that it could bring totally different experience to the table, and reach many students who are now struggling with getting access to conventional IELTS prep courses. ielts.test.ef...