Modern lifestyles mean that many parents have little time for their children. Many children suffer because they do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past.
Do you Agree or Disagree ?
The demand of modern lifestyles, keeping people intensely busy. And this can immensely effect parents and children relationships. Thus the discussion of whether or not children getting less attention from their parents as children did in the past is a debatable one. I strongly disagree to the point that modern lifestyles means, many parents not having enough time for their children.
Looking back to a brief period of time in 20th century where mother in middle-class family was remained at home and taking care children, cannot be suggested that children were in high contact with their parents and getting enough interactions. There were many stories in past about mishandling children by their parents due to not fully educated or aware.
In fact, nowadays, where both parents are well-educated, working and more aware with the surroundings, can maintain balance between work and family needs and influencing their children big time. Parents organize their holidays with kids and spend time in various recreational activities. Personally I have seen children comes from families where both parents work are more responsible and well mannered. Academically, kids setting higher milestones, more polished in their interpersonal skills and having high IQ levels.
At workplaces, employees being encouraged to bring their kids on various occasions and team building activities. In schools parents participate with kids in various programs and competitions which greatly enhance their relationship and communication among each other.
In my opinion, with this 21st century the whole viewpoint is changing that needs a greater perspective on this parents and children relationship. Children were suffer when they are neglected. Demand today is spending quality time with kids and provide them guidance and support rather than mere presence.
Pls Verify my Essay .
Pls grade my essay for Task 2
Modern lifestyles mean that many parents have little time for their children. Many children suffer because they do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past.
Do you Agree or Disagree ?
The demand of modern lifestyles, keeping people intensely busy. And this can immensely effect parents and children relationships. Thus the discussion of whether or not children getting less attention from their parents as children did in the past is a debatable one. I strongly disagree to the point that modern lifestyles means, many parents not having enough time for their children.
Looking back to a brief period of time in 20th century where mother in middle-class family was remained at home and taking care children, cannot be suggested that children were in high contact with their parents and getting enough interactions. There were many stories in past about mishandling children by their parents due to not fully educated or aware.
In fact, nowadays, where both parents are well-educated, working and more aware with the surroundings, can maintain balance between work and family needs and influencing their children big time. Parents organize their holidays with kids and spend time in various recreational activities. Personally I have seen children comes from families where both parents work are more responsible and well mannered. Academically, kids setting higher milestones, more polished in their interpersonal skills and having high IQ levels.
At workplaces, employees being encouraged to bring their kids on various occasions and team building activities. In schools parents participate with kids in various programs and competitions which greatly enhance their relationship and communication among each other.
In my opinion, with this 21st century the whole viewpoint is changing that needs a greater perspective on this parents and children relationship. Children were suffer when they are neglected. Demand today is spending quality time with kids and provide them guidance and support rather than mere presence.
Do you Agree or Disagree ?
The demand of modern lifestyles, keeping people intensely busy. And this can immensely effect parents and children relationships. Thus the discussion of whether or not children getting less attention from their parents as children did in the past is a debatable one. I strongly disagree to the point that modern lifestyles means, many parents not having enough time for their children.
Looking back to a brief period of time in 20th century where mother in middle-class family was remained at home and taking care children, cannot be suggested that children were in high contact with their parents and getting enough interactions. There were many stories in past about mishandling children by their parents due to not fully educated or aware.
In fact, nowadays, where both parents are well-educated, working and more aware with the surroundings, can maintain balance between work and family needs and influencing their children big time. Parents organize their holidays with kids and spend time in various recreational activities. Personally I have seen children comes from families where both parents work are more responsible and well mannered. Academically, kids setting higher milestones, more polished in their interpersonal skills and having high IQ levels.
At workplaces, employees being encouraged to bring their kids on various occasions and team building activities. In schools parents participate with kids in various programs and competitions which greatly enhance their relationship and communication among each other.
In my opinion, with this 21st century the whole viewpoint is changing that needs a greater perspective on this parents and children relationship. Children were suffer when they are neglected. Demand today is spending quality time with kids and provide them guidance and support rather than mere presence.
-
Johnson zhang
- Posts: 153
- Joined: Fri May 23, 2014 8:34 am
Re: Pls grade my essay for Task 2
it's very very difficult to read this essay. I suggest toning this one down a bit. there are many examples of good words in wrong places.meengo wrote:Modern lifestyles mean that many parents have little time for their children. Many children suffer because they do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past.
Do you Agree or Disagree ?
The demand of modern lifestyles, keeping people intensely busy. And this can immensely effect parents and children relationships. Thus the discussion of whether or not children getting less attention from their parents as children did in the past is a debatable one. I strongly disagree to the point that modern lifestyles means, many parents not having enough time for their children.
what does it mean, the demand of modern lifestyles ?
there isn't much logical progression here. this 'demand' affects their relationships. Thus it is debatable that if time spent on children by their parents is overall decreasing. how do them even connect?
Looking back to a brief period of time in 20th century where mother in middle-class family was remained at home and taking care children, cannot be suggested that children were in high contact with their parents and getting enough interactions. There were many stories in past about mishandling children by their parents due to not fully educated or aware.
In fact, nowadays, where both parents are well-educated, working and more aware with the surroundings, can maintain balance between work and family needs and influencing their children big time. Parents organize their holidays with kids and spend time in various recreational activities. Personally I have seen children comes from families where both parents work are more responsible and well mannered. Academically, kids setting higher milestones, more polished in their interpersonal skills and having high IQ levels.
At workplaces, employees being encouraged to bring their kids on various occasions and team building activities. In schools parents participate with kids in various programs and competitions which greatly enhance their relationship and communication among each other.
In my opinion, with this 21st century the whole viewpoint is changing that needs a greater perspective on this parents and children relationship. Children were suffer when they are neglected. Demand today is spending quality time with kids and provide them guidance and support rather than mere presence.
Nothing is impossible! Band score 9 is certainly not.
Re: Pls Verify my Essay .
Thanks Johnson zhang , I will work on it .. and post another one soon