Please check my IELTS writing.

[pol2k11]

Hello, everyone.
That is my first essay, could you check it and give me some advice to improve my writing. Thank you.

Some companies give their employees bonuses or cash awards for excellent work, in addition to salary. Do you think this is a good idea? Are cash incentives a good way to motivate employees?

Today many companies reward their best workers big cash bonuses for great job. However, not everyone agrees that a good type for motivation. This essay will look at some arguments for and against the money bonuses as a motivational factor for employees.

People have several arguments for cash incentives. They say that if employee knows about big currency bonuses for excellent work, he will be working more effective. Worker will do more work if knows, he will get more money. Money is an universal measure which could help to estimate employees. Other rewards cannot adequate stimulate workers, some get more some get less. Another reason for cash incentives is a simple way to reward employees, because not always possible to promote or to advance workmen.

On the other side, some people criticize money rewards. They think it is unfair for employees who prefer other benefits than money, such as a mobile phone payments, a car or a membership to the gym. The big cash bonuses can be causes of differences among workers in the company. And will be huge problem for firm, because some unsatisfied employees would want go aways to another workplace. If wages too low then money become motivational aspect for workmen. In this instance, people do not have other stimulus except money.

In summary, money is one of the best motivation in the work. However, employers must remember that all people different and not always vast cash bonuses is a good decision.

[pol2k11]

Someone who could check my writing?

[Prodigy]

Hi,

The question is

Do you think this is a good idea? Are cash incentives a good way to motivate employees?

Your quote is

This essay will look at some arguments for and against the money bonuses as a motivational factor for employees.

I guess while they clearly asked your opinion you discussed pros and cons of it without taking any stand conclusively. Is this ok ?

#IAmNotAnExpert