please assess my writing (2)

[tamersaad135]

Dears,

please help me, my test is next week, i need to know my weak points, and which band i fall in.

thank you to correct my mistakes..

What difficulties will face your country in the next ten years?
How can these problem be overcome?

Egypt faced a lot of issues in the past few years, from revolutions to terrorist attacks to deteriorate of the economy, which make it difficult to the new government to cover all these issues in the coming ten years. These problems are really big challenges to Egypt’s government to overcome, which mainly required to work for both improving the security and improving the country’s economic, the solutions of these difficulties are going to be analyzed in this essay.

Egypt have been always known as tourism country, which has one-third of the world's monuments plus very beautiful cities for resorting, diving and many other activates that tourists like to be engaged to. However, all those charming things are actually need stability and security to attract trusties to come. It is clearly shown that Egypt now is taking steps to overcome this security issue by increasing the number of well-trained policemen and haring the latest security equipment and tools. Therefore, by the near future the security issue will be overcame.

In addition to the above, Egypt needs to work for improving the economy in parallel, this can be done by encourage the investment. However, Egypt’s government is doing efforts now for improving the climate of investment. For instant, recently Egypt organized economic development conference in Sharm el-Sheikh city, which have been attended by huge numbers of kings and heads of states, big companies and local and foreigners business men are willing to invest in Egypt. Undoubtedly, this will be reflected in Egypt’s economic and improving it.

In conclusion, in my opinion, Egypt’s government is taking right and good steps to solve the security and economic issues by dealing with them seriously and with very fast actions in order to achieve the target within the coming ten years.

[tamersaad135]

please correct my mistakes..

[alhejaj]

Good essay. But you didn't explain what are these difficulties and what the solutions!

[tamersaad135]

Thank you for your comment, but I believe I did mention the difficultieies which are (improving the security and improving the country's economic) as well the solutions which are (increasing the number of well-trained policemen and hiring security equipment.. & encourage the investment)

What do you think?

[saqibali]

you need to work with Ryan style more

[tamersaad135]

Thanks..

in your opinion, at which band am I standing?

[alhejaj]

Could you please post your plan.

[tamersaad135]

My plan is 7