Throughout history, people have dreamed of living in a perfect society. However, there is still no agreement about what a perfect society would be like. What, in your opinion, would be the most important element of a perfect society? What can people do to help create an ideal society?
Ideal society or ideal life is a dream of many people for centuries. Arguments have come up among people regarding what is the most important factor for a perfect society. Some say it’s gender equality, some say it’s human right. But if I had to choose the one, most desirable element of an ideal society, it would have to be safety.
A safe society would be one in which crime did not exist, and in which all citizens trusted their neighbors, felt part of a community, and were even able to leave their doors unlocked without fear. A broader definition of safety could also include belief in the integrity of state institutions, such as governments or police forces, and confidence that we are all protected by fair laws. In this sense, safety could be described as the most basic freedom and the starting point for the creation of a perfect society.
There are several ways to create a safety society. One way is that government create jobs for all people, no one is unemployed and has stable income. Improving social security benefits for everyone in society, especially pregnant women, children and elderly is also a way to reach to safety society. Another way is that society should be protected by fair laws, everyone in society is treated equally, people obey the law and no crime exist. As a result, government pay less for police forces and give more for educations and decrease tax money, boost people’s income and everyone feel happy.
Help me correct my essay "perfect society", thank all
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andytruong1202
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Re: Help me correct my essay "perfect society", thank all
Ideal society or ideal life is a dream of many people for centuries. Arguments have come up among people regarding what is the most important factor for a perfect society. (Some say it’s gender equality, some say it’s human right) [weird] . (But if I had to choose the one, most desirable element of an ideal society, it would have to be safety) [However, if I had to decide what the most desirable element of an ideal society is, I would choose the safety element].
A safe society would be [the] one in which crime did not exist, and in which all citizens trusted their neighbours, felt part of a community, and were even able to leave their doors unlocked without fear. A broader definition of safety could also include belief in the integrity of state institutions, such as governments or police forces, and [the] confidence that we are all protected by fair laws. In this sense, safety could be described as the most basic freedom and the starting point for the creation of a perfect society.
There are several ways to create a safety society. One way is that governments create jobs for all people; no one is unemployed and [everyone] has stable income. Improving social security benefits for everyone in [that] society, especially pregnant women, children and elderly [elders] is also a way to reach to safety society [which results in a safe society]. Another way is that society [residents] should be protected by fair laws, everyone in society is treated equally, people obey the law and no crime exists. As a result, government pay less for police forces and give more for educations and decrease tax money, boost people’s income and everyone feel happy.
I suggest you improve your essay structure.
A safe society would be [the] one in which crime did not exist, and in which all citizens trusted their neighbours, felt part of a community, and were even able to leave their doors unlocked without fear. A broader definition of safety could also include belief in the integrity of state institutions, such as governments or police forces, and [the] confidence that we are all protected by fair laws. In this sense, safety could be described as the most basic freedom and the starting point for the creation of a perfect society.
There are several ways to create a safety society. One way is that governments create jobs for all people; no one is unemployed and [everyone] has stable income. Improving social security benefits for everyone in [that] society, especially pregnant women, children and elderly [elders] is also a way to reach to safety society [which results in a safe society]. Another way is that society [residents] should be protected by fair laws, everyone in society is treated equally, people obey the law and no crime exists. As a result, government pay less for police forces and give more for educations and decrease tax money, boost people’s income and everyone feel happy.
I suggest you improve your essay structure.
Re: Help me correct my essay "perfect society", thank all
Throughout history, people have dreamed of living in a perfect society. However, there is still no agreement about what a perfect society would be like. What, in your opinion, would be the most important element of a perfect society? What can people do to help create an ideal society?
After fixing:
Ideal society or ideal life is a dream of many people for centuries. Arguments have come up among people regarding what is the most important factor for a perfect society. Some people say it’s gender equality, others say it’s human right. But if I had to choose the one, most desirable element of an ideal society, it would have to be safety.
A safe society would be one in which crime did not exist, and in which all citizens trusted their neighbours, felt part of a community, and were even able to leave their doors unlocked without fear. A broader definition of safety could also include belief in the integrity of state institutions, such as governments or police forces, and confidence that we are all protected by fair laws. In this sense, safety could be described as the most basic freedom and the starting point for the creation of a perfect society.
There are several ways to create a safety society. One way is that government create jobs for all people, no one is unemployed and everyone has stable income. Improving social security benefits for everyone in society, especially pregnant women, children and elderly is also another way to reach to safety society. Also, society should be protected by fair laws so that everyone is treated equally, as a effects from positive impact of fairly treated, people will obey the law and no crime exist any more. As a result, government will decrease budgets for police forces and and increase budget for educations and exempt tax, boost people’s income to make everyone has a better life.
After fixing:
Ideal society or ideal life is a dream of many people for centuries. Arguments have come up among people regarding what is the most important factor for a perfect society. Some people say it’s gender equality, others say it’s human right. But if I had to choose the one, most desirable element of an ideal society, it would have to be safety.
A safe society would be one in which crime did not exist, and in which all citizens trusted their neighbours, felt part of a community, and were even able to leave their doors unlocked without fear. A broader definition of safety could also include belief in the integrity of state institutions, such as governments or police forces, and confidence that we are all protected by fair laws. In this sense, safety could be described as the most basic freedom and the starting point for the creation of a perfect society.
There are several ways to create a safety society. One way is that government create jobs for all people, no one is unemployed and everyone has stable income. Improving social security benefits for everyone in society, especially pregnant women, children and elderly is also another way to reach to safety society. Also, society should be protected by fair laws so that everyone is treated equally, as a effects from positive impact of fairly treated, people will obey the law and no crime exist any more. As a result, government will decrease budgets for police forces and and increase budget for educations and exempt tax, boost people’s income to make everyone has a better life.