please check my writing task two

[Max maximus]

People prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced ones. Why do you think this happens? Should government support local film makers finacially?

Nowaday, it is apparent that most of the individuals have a preference to be intertained by the movies coming from overseas rather than locally produced ones. The possible reason lying behind this phenomena is better qualities of foreign films as well as famous stars playing in them. The author of this essay believes that the government should make local film maker more innovative instead of subsidising.

To begin with, it is undoubtedly certain that the multitude of people are likely to watch the movies that have better quality, extraordinary actions and their favourite international actors or actresses. For instance, “Harry  Potter” and “Avatar” are best-selling films because they demonstrate many magical scenes and fantasies that human being watch enthusiastically. In addition, illustration of the lifestyle or the play of monotonous actors and actresses can the reason why people do not pay attention to local films.

Furthermore, it is sometimes claimed that local films are not attractive and  better qualitative  due to the lack of financial support. However, in my opinion, the government should make local film producers work harder in order to earn more audiences. Providing that the authority encourage local film manufactors financially , they might rely on the government subsidy when they are on the point of making a film. Moreover, local film makers could earn a great deal of money for their prospective films on condition that they captivate many spectators by making their film better featured and full of breand new scenes for the population of their country.

In summary, it seems to me that a good quality and main actors of the movies can be the reason why people mostly prefer to watch and local film makers should be more innovative and earn many audiences isntead of waiting the government support.

[sebastian]

Hi!

Clear idea, cohesive and good vocab, nice use of clear examples. Now, some nitpicks:

Some spelling mistakes:

to be intertained by the movies coming from overseas rather than locally produced ones.

full of breand new scenes for the population of their country.

isntead of waiting ...

Singular vs plural:

The possible reason lying behind this phenomena is

The author of this essay believes that the government should make local film maker more innovative

that human being watch enthusiastically.

Providing that the authority encourage local film manufactors financially

Special case:

better qualities of foreign films as well as famous stars playing in them.

For this context, 'quality' (as in, 'level of excellence') is uncountable.

Missing or wrong words:

the play of monotonous actors and actresses can the reason why ...

Should be 'can be the reason why...'-

local film makers could earn a great deal of money for their prospective films

Should be 'a great deal of money from their prospective films...'

on condition that they captivate many spectators

Should be 'on the condition that...'

...waiting the government support.

Could be either 'awaiting government support' or 'waiting for the government support' or 'awaiting support from the government'.

Sound text, though, and those small details don't obstruct communication too much anyway. Keep up the good work!