PLEASE KINDLY ASSESS MY WRITING TASK 2 - CONVENIENCE FOODS

[hollanda]

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this notion?

It is argued that due to the widespread of convenience foods, traditional cuisine and conventional methods of food production will gradually disappear. In my opinion, I completely disagree with this notion.

Firstly, traditional foods are irreplaceable no matter how prevalent fast food becomes for various reasons. The most noticeable one is that traditional foods are highly valued by the elderly. The reason is that the elderly generation were brought up by these foods, thereby they tend to prefer them the most and continue to eat them instead of changing to fast food. In addition, traditional cuisines are commonly considered as an identity of a country, which characterizes it with other nations. If traditional cuisines died out, many customs, traditions and culture might also be blurred along with them. Therefore, I believe that the government will not allow traditional foods to be replaced by convenience food.

Secondly, traditional methods of food manufacturing will remain existing for both economic and cultural reasons. From an economic perspective, the adaptation of modern food production will require time and many resources. Thus many countries, especially developing countries, might be reluctant to change their traditional food producing completely due to the shortage of budget. Furthermore, for the cultural reason, it is undoubtedly that many families still prefer preparing foods at home on the national festivals using traditional methods as a way to express their appreciation to their ancestors. For example, during the spring festival, Vietnamese people prepare a traditional dish called Chung cake, which is made of rice, pork and beans. This dish has to be prepared at home following a certain process and there is no alternative to prepare this dish.

In conclusion, although the prevalence of processed foods is becoming prominent, I am convinced that traditional foods and traditional methods of food preparation will still be used alongside.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hi Hollanda,

First main paragraph - If convenience foods are becoming popular, then they ARE replacing traditional foods! What happens when the elderly die and the elderly of the future are the younger people of today? Explain how changes in cuisine lead to changes in culture. What is the government's role?

Second main paragraph - The idea that non-traditional food will not be adopted for financial reasons tends to be undermined by the expansion of KFC and others brands. Banh chung does not have to be made at home!

Grammar is good, with a variety of structures. However, vocabulary is weak, with meaning either not clearly expressed or ideas not sufficiently developed.

All the best,
David