space exploration

[Wayfarer]

(I wrote this essay 3 months ago. Though I don't believe it will convince an examiner whatsoever, I decided to give it a try)



Topic: Too much money is being spent on space exploration while people are starving on Earth. Discuss.

For centuries, people have been in numerous disputes over the existence of extra-terrestrial intelligence. These days, however, due to recent technological advances, humanity is very likely to discover the mysteries preventing us to believe that we are not the only intelligent creatures in the universe. Although some people strongly object to further space explorations since humans are burdened with many obstacles, my view is that these studies have to remain.

While many critics of space explorations are concerned about people in poverty in the countries of a third of the world, the real question is whether the abandonment of these researches will be any assistance to them. Logically thinking, the answer is positive as around 25 billion dollars are allocated to space explorations in United States alone. However, in reality It is highly unlikely that developed countries would expend the large piece of their budget to making provisions to poor countries. Instead, they might probably spend it on education, medical care or transportation systems as there are few countries in the world without internal issues. Thus, there is no substantial point on abolishing the studies on exploring the universe.

Secondly, those who are convinced that only curiosity drives people to explore the cosmos are overlooking the fact that humans cannot reside on the Earth permanently. Recent observations on climate change have indicated that global warming will possibly occur within a century turning the Earth into absolutely inhospitable place. If it is set to be, then we are obliged to search for other planets to colonise and continue our existence. Even though enthusiasts would suggest that people will have time in the future to further those studies, why to reserve something that you can start now.

Taking these points into consideration, it can be inferred that space explorations play a crucial role in humans future survival and thus must be properly invested.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

Overall, not a bad essay, but I think that the points could have been made more clearly. This is mainly dues to vocab and grammar mistakes.

All the best,
David