IELTS WRITING TASK 2

[lvxiran]

Some people think that working with a high salary is more important, but others think that a good working environment is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.


MY ANSWER:
Money is a main motivation for people to work hard, but the working environment can stimulate individuals to act better, too. People have been arguing about which one is more important between the two. If I were to say, a good working environment is more essential for me.

A high salary means a better life. People who earn a lot of money usually have higher living standards. They can enjoy their lives by going to good reataurants and buying luxury goods and so on, which will also give them a sense of achievement about their jobs. People who have good performance at work are likely to expect a high salary for they take it as a proof of their accomplishment.

At the same time, working in a good environment also motivates people. A good working environment means there are good working facilities and good collegues whom people can learn from, which will help make progress at work and make it more possible for people to be satisfied with their jobs. People tend to be in a good mood when they are working in an environment like this, so they will be more willing to work harder. All these advantages that a good working environment has, can lead to individuals’ promotions because they stimulate people in many ways.

From my perspective, a good working environment does people more good than a high salary, because it makes people work in pleasant surroundings and can lead to a raise. There are demanding jobs that give people a lot of money for doing hard work, mostly physically, but the working environment can be poor. In contrast, a good working environment provides people with more opportunities to improve themselves on a spirit-lifting basis, which indirectly motivates people to earn more money in an easier way.



PS: I would love it if you could correct and grade my essay, I need to get at least 6.5 out of 9 in writing. You can grade me in 4 criteria: task response/ coherence&cohesion/ lexical resources/ grammatical range and accuracy

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

Task - Very good! You have answered the question and provided good development and examples.

Coherence - Very good use of a wide range of connectives. Sentence oreder is good and paragraphing is clear.

Vocabulary - Very good range with some less common items.

Grammar - Good range and accuracy. Some good use of modals, but some conditionals would be an improvement.

Overall, well done!
David