Good day everyone
My exam date is about to hit the calendar and I was just wondering if anyone could check my essays.
Your help is appreciated.
Nowadays, some people say that they would prefer not to have children at all because it is stressful and they prevent progress.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Having children has been considered to be one of the greatest sources of happiness for humankind since beginning of the history. Nevertheless, some modern married couples began opting for childless life claiming it to be budget-friendly and stress-free. As far as I am concerned, the coined movement might bring negative outcomes to the society and in this essay, I am going to advocate the importance of procreation.
First and foremost, people who restrain from having children leave themselves at risk of living in melancholy and loneliness. Indeed, children may cause stress when they are young and require tons of special care, attention and education. Nevertheless, they are destined to be main supporters of their parents when they will have aged by that time. This is because elderly people can’t look after themselves let alone make a living, leaving them vulnerable the same way their offspring used to be.
Secondly, reproduction has played a crucial role in the evolution of humankind. It is confirmed by scientists that brains of children advance every decade, making it superior than their parents and open for new perspectives. In other words, without reproduction, technological advancements and everyday items that we see around every corner would not. Hypothetically, by leading a childless life, we may hinder our progress and jeopardize our future owing to lack of new minds.
On the other hand, It cannot be gainsaid that having even one child is severely difficult due to costs of modern life. Major part of parents’ income would go child’s health and daily needs, not mentioning their education. This fact doesn’t leave a tiny chance for parents to confidently chase their goals.
To summarize, it would be correct to say that raising a family is a long difficult journey and source of euphoria at the same time. The bright and tranquil future shall prevail as long as we can encourage young couples to continue their family tree.
Writing Task 1&2
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David.IELTS.Examiner
- IELTS Examiner
- Posts: 1371
- Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am
Re: Writing Task 1&2
Hello!
coined movement?
Your first main paragraph is based on an assumption which is often not true, particularly in more developed countries and in countries that are developing quite quickly.
As for your second main paragraph, the Flynn effect is not conclusive, and even Flynn has doubts as to whether it actually means that intelligence is rising. You are also assuming that ALL people stop having children, whereas the question clearly refers to 'some'.
It cannot be gainsaid?
This fact (which isn't a fact!) doesn't leave a tiny chance?
How can you possibly come to the conclusion that having children leads to tranquility?! Are you aware of how much violence there is in the modern world?
Overall, your arguments are simply not valid and the conclusion is very weak and easily dismissed.
All the best,
David
coined movement?
Your first main paragraph is based on an assumption which is often not true, particularly in more developed countries and in countries that are developing quite quickly.
As for your second main paragraph, the Flynn effect is not conclusive, and even Flynn has doubts as to whether it actually means that intelligence is rising. You are also assuming that ALL people stop having children, whereas the question clearly refers to 'some'.
It cannot be gainsaid?
This fact (which isn't a fact!) doesn't leave a tiny chance?
How can you possibly come to the conclusion that having children leads to tranquility?! Are you aware of how much violence there is in the modern world?
Overall, your arguments are simply not valid and the conclusion is very weak and easily dismissed.
All the best,
David