Please evaluate my Letter

[Miaacoby]

You stayed at your friends’ house when you participated in a business seminar in Australia. You left a file with important documents in your room.
Task: Write a letter to your friend, describing the file and ask him/her to return it to you by post.

Dear Jimmy,

It was a pleasure to meet you yesterday in Sydney. Your hospitality is unforgettable and I hope I return this in near future.

I feel sorry for disturbing you again by writing this letter and diverting your attention to my affairs. Unfortunately, the situation has forced me to draw your time. You see, mistakenly, I have forgotten my file in my room, allocated by you for my stay. The file contains important educational certificates and travel documents.As you can understand that these documents are very important and I need them on daily and regularly basis for my professional assignments and travels, therefore, i can not afford to collect them after long time during my next visit.
I understand that I am throwing an extra burden on you but I have no other solution than asking you to post this file to me via courier. Considering our history of good relationship, I hope you would not mind doing me this favor. I would return the courier fee within three business days via postal money transfer services.

Say my regards to your family,

Miacoby

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

This is a very good letter. The level of familiarity is correct. There is a good range of vocabulary. There are some grammatical errors, but the range of structures is good. Organisation is clear.

All the best,
David

[Miaacoby]

Thanks for the feedback.

1) Can you please correct the mistakes
2) Can you assign a band?

Thanks.

[FastTrackIELTS]

Hi Jimmy,

I have highlighted any grammatical errors below. Please let me know if you require any further feedback. You can also get further assistance on www.passmyielts.com where we offer full comprehensive feedback to all sections of the IELTS exam. I would assign this writing assignment a score of around 7.0 to 7.5.

Most of the errors are just small errors in common phrases however the essay itself is fantastic and it is clear you have fully understood what was asked.

I hope this is of some use to you.

Jordan

You stayed at your friends’ house when you participated in a business seminar in Australia. You left a file with important documents in your room.
Task: Write a letter to your friend, describing the file and ask him/her to return it to you by post.

Dear Jimmy,

It was a pleasure to meet you yesterday in Sydney. Your hospitality was unforgettable and I hope I return in the near future.

I feel sorry for disturbing you again by writing this letter and diverting your attention to my affairs. Unfortunately, the situation has forced me to draw your time. You see, mistakenly, I have forgotten my file in the room allocated by you for my stay. The file contains important educational certificates and travel documents. As you may be able to understand, these documents are very important and I need them on a daily and regular basis for my professional assignments and travels, therefore, I can not afford to collect them until my next visit which may be a long time.
I understand that I am throwing an extra burden on you but I have no other solution than asking you to post this file to me via courier. Considering our history of a good relationship, I hope you would not mind doing me this favor. I would return the courier fee within three business days via a postal money transfer service.

Please send my regards to your family,

Miacoby