This is a band 9 essay !!!<

[Aky]

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People have different views about whether governments should introduce a maximum wage. While in some ways it may seem reasonable to allow people to earn as much as companies are willing to pay, I personally believe that employee remuneration should be capped at a certain level.

There are various reasons why it might be considered beneficial to allow people to be paid extremely high salaries. If companies offer excellent pay packages, they can attract the most talented people in their fields to work for them. For example, technology companies like Google are able to employ the best programmers because of the huge sums that they are willing to pay. Furthermore, these well-paid employees are likely to be highly motivated to work hard and therefore drive their businesses successfully. In theory, this should result in a thriving economy and increased tax revenues, which means that paying high salaries benefits everyone.

However, I agree with those who argue that there should be a maximum wage. By introducing a limit on earnings, the pay-gap between bosses and employees can be reduced. Currently, the difference between normal and top salaries is huge, and this can demotivate workers who feel that the situation is unfair. With lower executive salaries, it might become feasible to introduce higher minimum wages, and everybody would be better off. One possible consequence of greater equality could be that poverty and crime rates fall because the general population will experience an improved standard of living.

In conclusion, it seems to me that it would be better, on balance, for governments to set a limit on the wages of the highest earners in society.

(274 words, band 9)

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

I wouldn't rate this as band 9. (And not just to be my usual awkward self!)

1. There is an assumption that people only work for the company that pays them the most. This is simply untrue. Many people are motivated by other factors such as social good, prestige, and patriotism.

2. You do not deal with people who own the companies. you might be able to cap the money they take as salaries, but how can you cap the value of their company, which they can sell to make money?

3. Celebrities. How do you cap their earnings?

4. The last sentence of the second main paragraph requires support.

Thank you for posting this, though. It's useful to know what a good essay looks like.
All the best,
David