IELTS GT Task 1: Comments pls

[bumblebee]

Pls comment and advise how to improve further. Thanks!

Topic: You recently ordered something online. When the delivery came it was not complete. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: explain what you ordered and what was missing from your delivery, explain the importance of this delivery, ask for a replacement item to be sent.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to complain about my recent unhappy shopping experience with your company.

I have recently bought a few items from your website - a pair of earrings, a one-piece evening dress and a pair of high heel shoes and have received the parcel a week after. I was shocked when I opened the parcel as I found out the dress I ordered was missing.

I have spent nights searching for the best outfit styling so I can look at my best on my sister's engagement party which is happening in four days time. She is the most important person in my life and I want to make sure everything is perfect so she can have the best memory.

I demand you to take immediate action to have someone to send me the missing dress in person as soon as possible, else I will file a serious complaint to your top management.

I look forward to your immediate response.

Yours faithfully,
Jamie

[saqibali]

Please point out 3-4 sentences that are out of topic. After it, I will guide you again for improvement in vocabulary and sentence structure.