Please assess my Task 2 General Writing. Thank You!

[antsatno]

Question:
Of all public transportation options, a metro is the most convenient way to
get around a large city. Do you agree or disagree?

Answer:
Maintaining traffic in large cities are becoming a hectic problem for developing countries. Governments are spending huge amount of money in building up metro railways to improve the commute process. Since metro are quicker, cheaper and safer I completely agree that metro is the most convenient way to travel across the city.

First, travelling across the city using metro railways are chepear and safer. In developing countries like India, railways tickets are less expensive than road transports. Due to its ticket price, many people in India do prefer metro railways. Also, according to the statistics published by the Indian Government number of accidents in metro are less than road trip accidents. Thus people believe metro is the better option while travelling especially womens and old people.

Secondly, commuting in train takes less time when compared to other road trip options. For example, travelling in train for about 60 kilo meter would take around one and half hours. However, the same distance will take around three hours if you adopt a bus transport. Time savings is always a benefit for commuters. Also, trains running in metro does follow a strict timings. This makes metro a much more comfortable option for commuters like working professionals. Apart from all these benefits, metro does also provide WiFi access, rest rooms during the journey period. All these characteristics makes people to prefer metro transportation.

Transportation is always a problem for large developing cities. In the recent years, many metro project have been established to handle this issue. As discussed in the above statements, it clearly indicates that metro is the best option for the people to commute across a large city.

[saqibali]

Here are my comments. I can re-write the essay, if you ask.

1. Its a bit off the topic. Please think a bit about topic, scope ( write it on paper) and keywords before you start your sentence. Its always best to plan essay.

2. Coherence. Most of the sentence are not in flow.

Almost 5.5 band

[antsatno]

Hi saqibali,

Thanks for your comments. Its my first essay, def I will improve on the content! And work on your comments as well.

Thanks again for your time on this.