Please asses my task 2 essay

[Muhammad922]

Q:Developed countries have created many environmental problems in the World, particularly in their contribution to global warming.

What can be done to reduce the dangers of global warming?

My answer:
There is no doubt that global warming is an international problem and it is caused by mainly human activities,and its detrimental impacts have been affecting many nations for decades,so it is imperative to find some ways to limit these harmful effects. It is argued that The most important methods are honing people knowledge about this obstacle and supporting the new inventions in this feild.

Firstly,it is commonly thought that the main method to confront this phenomenon is increasing the public awareness.As improving the understanding of people about environmental issues is decisive factor to draw their attention to the processes that harm the nature,and this will encourage them to follow more effective ways to generate their power needs by using renewable resources which are environmentally friendly. In addition,public awareness will put the government's under pressure to redirect their policy to be less harmful to the planet. As a result,there will be more restrictions on factories and industrial firms to make their activities more friendly to the environment.

Secondly,another effective method to to decline the dire impacts of green house phenomenon is by supporting the inventions that aim to make the Earth more appropriate to life. For instance, a recent American invention funded by local companies launched up and targets to clean the pacific from the plastic waste. There are many invented methods should not only support but even fund from governments and community to set up and promote it .Thus,more individuals and governments will utilize these environmentally friendly solutions.

In conclusion,the global warming is a worldwide crisis and there are many avenues to limit it's destructive consequences,but the most essential are growing the public knowledge about this crisis and,in addition, supporting and motivating the inventors and experts to find out new effective ways that help the humanity to preserve its planet.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

I'm always skeptical of the 'more awareness' argument. I mean, is there any adult in the developed world who has not heard of global warming? No? Then that kinda destroys your first main paragraph.

Cleaning up plastic will do nothing - nothing! - to combat global warming. Hence, both main paragraphs are virtually meaningless.

Grammar and vocabulary cannot really save you at this point.

All the best,
David

[Flick]

Q:Developed countries have created many environmental problems in the World, particularly in their contribution to global warming.

What can be done to reduce the dangers of global warming?

My answer:
There is no doubt that global warming is an international problem caused by mainly human activities, and its detrimental impacts have been affecting many nations for decades, so it is imperative to find some ways to limit these harmful effects. It is argued that the most important methods are improving people's knowledge about this obstacle and supporting new inventions in this field.

Firstly, it is commonly thought that the main method to confront this phenomenon is to increase public awareness, as improving people's understanding of environmental issues will draw their attention to the processes that harm nature, and this will encourage them to use more effective ways to generate their power needs through renewable resources which are environmentally friendly. In addition, public awareness will put governments under pressure to redirect their policy to be less harmful to the planet. As a result, there will be more restrictions on factories and industrial firms to make their activities more friendly to the environment.

Secondly, another effective method to reduce the dire impacts of the green house phenomenon is by supporting inventions that aim to make the Earth more appropriate to life. For instance, a recent American invention funded by local companies launched and aims to clean the pacific of plastic waste. There are many inventions that should be supported and even funded by governments and communities.Thus, more individuals and governments will utilize these environmentally friendly solutions.

In conclusion, global warming is a worldwide crisis and there are many avenues to limit its destructive consequences, but the most essential are improving public knowledge about this crisis and, in addition, supporting and motivating inventors and experts to discover new and effective ways to help preserve the planet.