The internet means people do not need to travel to foreign countiries to understand how others live. To what extend do you agree?
Nowadays it has become easier to learn about cultures from different nations online without travelling abroad. I completely agree that there are plenty of information available over internet which can provide comprehensive knowledge about the living style and tradition of people from all around the world.
One reason that people are not required to visit foreign destination to understand local customs is that all kinds of information are available within a click. In other words, by studying various documents available online, we can know about the daily life of foreign people instantly, which was not possible before the invention of internet. For example, to understand about people and tradition in India, one doesn’t have to travel to India rather can learn with various pictures, videos and written documents uploaded by the residents and even other foreigners. Therefore, it is more convenient to do a research online where an individual has an easy access to accurate and reliable data.
Moreover, there are many travel blogs of famous travelers and researchers who make and upload detailed videos of their journey. In fact, people can develop a comprehensive understanding of a foreign place and local culture more effectively by researching over internet compared to traveling on own because one might not be able to visit all the places but can view various travel blogs. Students, for instance, do online research and prepare a long report about inhabitants of another nation where they have never been to. Thus, internet has facilitated people with real life like experiences of traveling and learning alien living style without traveling at all.
In conclusion, I believe that internet has aided people with immense amount of information and traveling documentaries about an overseas community and how people live there, which has certainly reduced the requirement of travelling another nation just to understand their culture.
Preparing for IELTS GT: Task 2, Please evaluate
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anmolpandey
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Re: Preparing for IELTS GT: Task 2, Please evaluate
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Thanks for your submission anmolpandey!! Please see my rewrite below ...
INTRO:
Nowadays it has become easier to learn about cultures from different nations without travelling abroad BECAUSE OF THE INTERNET. I completely agree that there IS plenty of information available ON THE internet which can provide comprehensive knowledge about the DIFFERENT living styleS and traditionS of people from all around the world.
B1:
One reason that people are not required to visit foreign destinationS to understand local customs is that all kinds of information are available WITH JUST a click. In other words, by studying SOME OF THE WEBSITES available online, we can EASILY FIND OUT about the daily liVES of foreign people IN AN INSTANT, which was not possible before the invention of THE internet. For example, to understand about THE people and traditionS in India, one does NOT have to travel to India BUT CAN rather can learn with various pictures, videos and written documents uploaded by the residents and even other foreigners. Therefore, it is more convenient to do (delete 'a') research online where an individual has (delete 'an') easy access to accurate and reliable data.
B2:
Moreover, there are many travel blogs WRITTEN BY famous travelers and researchers who make and upload detailed videos of their journeyS. In fact, people can develop a comprehensive understanding
of a foreign place and local culture more effectively by researching over THE internet compared to traveling on THEIR own, THE REASON BEING THAT THEY might not be able to visit all the places but can EASILY view various travel blogs. Students, for instance, do online research and prepare a long report about inhabitants of another nation where they have never been to. Thus, THE internet has PROVIDED people with real life like experiences of traveling and learning alien living styleS without HAVING TO ACTUALLY TRAVEL at all.
CONC:
In conclusion, I believe that THE internet has aided people with immense amountS of information and TRAVEL documentaries about (delete 'an') overseas communitIES and how people live there, which has certainly reduced the requirement of travelling TO other nationS just to understand their culture.
Advice:
1. 'rather' is not a conjunction so must be combined with 'but' in B1.
2. Make sure you are clear about the difference between count and non-count nouns i.e. 'research' (non-count) and 'access' (non-count) in B1.
3. 'THE' internet, because there is only one internet in the whole world.
VERY NICE ESSAY! I think you worked hard on it, right??? 
Band-score:
TA: 7.5
G: 6.0
V: 7.0
CC: 7.0
Homepage: https://www.this-course.com
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbVrKy ... LmQirBfSTw
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thiscoursesocial/
Thanks for your submission anmolpandey!! Please see my rewrite below ...
INTRO:
Nowadays it has become easier to learn about cultures from different nations without travelling abroad BECAUSE OF THE INTERNET. I completely agree that there IS plenty of information available ON THE internet which can provide comprehensive knowledge about the DIFFERENT living styleS and traditionS of people from all around the world.
B1:
One reason that people are not required to visit foreign destinationS to understand local customs is that all kinds of information are available WITH JUST a click. In other words, by studying SOME OF THE WEBSITES available online, we can EASILY FIND OUT about the daily liVES of foreign people IN AN INSTANT, which was not possible before the invention of THE internet. For example, to understand about THE people and traditionS in India, one does NOT have to travel to India BUT CAN rather can learn with various pictures, videos and written documents uploaded by the residents and even other foreigners. Therefore, it is more convenient to do (delete 'a') research online where an individual has (delete 'an') easy access to accurate and reliable data.
B2:
Moreover, there are many travel blogs WRITTEN BY famous travelers and researchers who make and upload detailed videos of their journeyS. In fact, people can develop a comprehensive understanding
of a foreign place and local culture more effectively by researching over THE internet compared to traveling on THEIR own, THE REASON BEING THAT THEY might not be able to visit all the places but can EASILY view various travel blogs. Students, for instance, do online research and prepare a long report about inhabitants of another nation where they have never been to. Thus, THE internet has PROVIDED people with real life like experiences of traveling and learning alien living styleS without HAVING TO ACTUALLY TRAVEL at all.CONC:
In conclusion, I believe that THE internet has aided people with immense amountS of information and TRAVEL documentaries about (delete 'an') overseas communitIES and how people live there, which has certainly reduced the requirement of travelling TO other nationS just to understand their culture.
Advice:
1. 'rather' is not a conjunction so must be combined with 'but' in B1.
2. Make sure you are clear about the difference between count and non-count nouns i.e. 'research' (non-count) and 'access' (non-count) in B1.
3. 'THE' internet, because there is only one internet in the whole world.
VERY NICE ESSAY! I think you worked hard on it, right???
Band-score:
TA: 7.5
G: 6.0
V: 7.0
CC: 7.0
