Most of the people in society enjoy watching crime movies and criminal TV programs.

[prishi_2300]

Most of the people in society enjoy watching crime movies and criminal TV programs. Why do you think people have more interest to watch them? What is the impact on society due to this?

Criminal television has become very popular in recent times with a vast crowd that enjoys watching such movies and programs. I believe that people watch them out of curiosity. Watching such shows increases awareness and provides us with entertainment at the same time. In this essay, I am going to discuss the impact that crime movies and criminal TV shows have on society as a large.

A large number of real-life incidents are depicted in criminal movies and television shows, making them all the more appealing to the audience. The viewers feel compelled to watch them out of curiosity, since they have already heard and read about these true incidents that had inspired the shows or movies and want to learn more about the details. For example, I recently saw a miniseries which was based on true events of a serial rape case based in the states of Washington and Colorado. I was intrigued to know more about the case just by reading the synopsis of the show since it was based on the real-life incidents of young girls. There have been so many such cases that have inspired cinema.

Life is never predictable and anything can happen at any instance. It is always best to be prepared for the worst. Another reason for watching the criminal genre is to increase our awareness regarding our surroundings and to be mentally prepared for the worst. For example, there a few shows which televise real-life incidences area-wise, alerting the people of that particular area. Such events push us to learn self-defense in order to protect ourselves in any situation, and cinematizing criminal activities spread awareness to a huge crowd at once, serving a greater benefit to society.

I personally believe that the criminal genre of cinema and television is beneficial for society and that more and more people should indulge in watching them. They serve two purposes; making us aware and curbing our curiosity, at the same time.

[goldcoastielts]

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Thanks for your submission prishi_2300!! Please see my rewrite below ...

INTRO:
Criminal television has CRIME SHOWS ON TV HAVE become very popular in recent times with a HUGE AUDIENCE that enjoys watching THESE KINDS OF movies and programs. I believe that people watch them out of curiosity. Watching such shows increases awareness and provides us with entertainment at the same time. In this essay, I am going to discuss the impact that crime movies and criminal TV shows have on society (delete 'as a') AT large.

B1:
A large number of real-life incidents are depicted in criminal movies and television shows, WHICH MAKES them all the more appealing to the audience. The viewers feel compelled to watch them out of curiosity, since they have already heard and read about these true incidents that (delete 'had') inspired the shows or movies and want to learn more about the details. For example, I recently saw a miniseries which was based on THE true events of a serial rape case based in the US states of Washington and Colorado. I was intrigued to know more about the case just by reading the synopsis of the show since it was based on the real-life incidents of young girls .. AFTER JUST READING THE SYNOPSIS OF THE SHOW AND LEARNING THAT IT WAS BASED ON THE REAL-LIFE INCIDENTS OF SOME/TWO/A COUPLE OF YOUNG GIRLS, I WAS INTRIGUED TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE CASE . (delete whole sentence: There have been so many such cases that have inspired cinema.)

B2:
Life is never predictable and anything can happen at any instance, AND AS SUCH it is always best to be prepared for the worst. Another reason for watching the criminal genre is THAT WE CAN EASILY increase our awareness regarding our surroundings and (delete 'to') be mentally prepared for the worst. For example, there a few shows which televise real-life INCIDENTS AREA-BY-AREA, alerting the people of (delete 'that') particular areaS (about what??). Such events ENCOURAGE us to learn self-defense in order to protect ourselves in any situation, and cinematizing criminal activities CAN spread awareness to a huge crowd VERY QUICKLY, serving a greater benefit to society.

CONC:
I personally believe that the criminal genre of cinema and television is beneficial for society and that more and more people should indulge in watching IT. They serve IT SERVES two purposes SIMULTANEOUSLY; making us aware and curbing our curiosity. (delete 'at the same time'.)


This is a good essay. However I would say that the B1 is MUCH stronger than the B2. If you keep the quality more unified, the mark would be higher.
Advice:
1. Don't overuse words, you used 'such' twice in the intro. Try to use synonyms instead of repeating a lot.
2. The last sentence of B1 feels like it was just added on as an afterthought. You should probably delete it or rewrite somehow.
3. 'area-wise' sounds a bit strange in this type of essay.
4. incidents, not incidences
5. V + 'AT ONCE' not PREP PHRASE + 'AT ONCE'

Band-score:
TA: 6.0 ( I think you answered the first question really well, but the second about the effect on society not as well)
G: 7.5
V: 7.5
CC: 6.5 (add some linking language to the topic sentences of each body paragraph)