Can you help me?

[SeaGirl]

Please check my grammar:

Today was a relax day. I went to gym with my friend zhuli .we excised about 2 hours .frist we jogged for 30 minters .second we did Yoga for 20 minters.then we existed airs and legs.when we finished gym we went to other room to play table tennis .i thought that was my first time play table tennis. In the past I had never think I will like this prot. But now I like it.its a good sport to keep fit.

[bunni015]

Please check my grammar:

Today was a relax day. I went to gym with my friend zhuli .we excised about 2 hours .frist we jogged for 30 minters .second we did Yoga for 20 minters.then we existed airs and legs.when we finished gym we went to other room to play table tennis .i thought that was my first time play table tennis. In the past I had never think I will like this prot. But now I like it.its a good sport to keep fit.

Today was a relax day. I went to gym with my friend Zhuli .We excised about 2 hours .Frist, we jogged for 30 minters .Second, we did Yoga for 20 minters.Then we existed airs and legs.When we finished gym, we went to other room to play table tennis .I thought that was my first time play table tennis. In the past, I had never think I will like this prot. But now, I like it.Its a good sport to keep fit.

Total word count is 84

I am not sure about what do you mean by "then we existed airs and legs." and "minters". Minter refers to a "skilled worker who makes coins and stamps".


I felt you have used only simple sentence type. The key to success in IELTS or in English writing is, use variety of sentences forms(Simple, Compound,Complex).

After rephrasing, based on, my understanding & knowledge.There is a possibility that you may find errors in it, too.

Today was a relaxing day. So, me and my friend Zhuli went to gym and excised about 2 hours. There we jogged for 30 minutes and then we did yoga for 20 minutes. After workout and Yoga, we left to play Table tennis.Although it was first time to play Table tennis, I really liked it and it is a great sport to keep fit.

Total word count is 65

Regards
Bunni

[Abs]

SeaGirl wrote:
Please check my grammar:
Today was a relax day. I went to gym with my friend zhuli .we excised about 2 hours .frist we jogged for 30 minters .second we did Yoga for 20 minters.then we existed airs and legs.when we finished gym we went to other room to play table tennis .i thought that was my first time play table tennis. In the past I had never think I will like this prot. But now I like it.its a good sport to keep fit.

HAVE A LOOK AT IT:

Today was a relaxing day! I went to the gym with my friend Zhuli, and spent two hours exercising. First, we jogged for 30 minutes before doing yoga for another 20 minutes. Then we went to the other room to play table tennis. I think this was the first time I ever played it. Although I was not keen on playing or watching this particular sport in the past, I now just enjoy it. Its a great sport to keep fit.

[Ryan]

Hi SeaGirl,

It does not look as though this piece was written in response to an IELTS task, but thank you all the same for sharing it here.

Bunni does a great job pointing out the areas of error. Abs's rewrite is quite good. Please refer to his/her suggestions.

Good luck,
Ryan