Task 2 Writing!

[aprodigy]

Topic: Some people believe that governments should protect the lesser-known languages, but others believe this is a waste of money. Discuss both of side and give your own opinion
It is true that in today’s world lesser-known languages are disappearing. Therefore, some people claim that government should spend money to preserve these languages, but others believe this expenditure is a waste of money. From my point of view, I agree with the former ideas for several reasons.
On one hand, obviously, there are several reasons why governments should not invest on the lesser-known languages. Firstly, it is easily to realize that expensive education programs should be given in both schools and institutions in order to draw learners to these languages. That is to say, governments should use a large number of money for some necessary items in terms of facilities, teachers and marketing. As a result, far little attention has been paid to other public services. Furthermore, it seems that having only one language is cheaper and more efficient for the country because of costs of investment.
On the other hand, it is essential for governments to protect languages which are known less and less. As a matter of the fact, language is not only means of communication but also vital connections among all people in the whole society. If these languages are preserved and developed, surely the values of traditional customs and the varieties of cultures will be maintained. Moreover, it is a good opportunity for young people to understand the nature of the lesser-known languages widely. By perceiving these languages, the young generation is likely to expect to broaden the effects of using them to other countries.
In general, it may save money in the short term if we allow minority languages to disappear, but in the long run this would have negative effects on our cultural heritage.

[durai]

It is true that lesser-known languages are rapidly disappearing all over the world. . While some people claim that government should spend money to preserve these languages, others believe that this expenditure is a waste of money. From my point of view, I agree with the former idea ( only one idea) for several reasons.

sample: Over the last decade, government's investment to protect less popular languages has significantly increased the world over. While some opine that these are of a complete waste of money, others believe that the government should preserve less spoken languages. This essay is an attempt to analyse both sides before arriving at a satisfactory outcome.

On the one hand, remove 'obviously', informal tone and two transition words cannot go together and .there are several reasons why governments should not invest on the less popular ( avoid repetition languages. Firstly, it is easy to realize that expensive education programs should be given in both schools and institutions in order to draw learners attention to these languages. you gave the reason why they shouldn't invest, but your wordings is bit faulty and doesn't give clear meaning on what you trying to say That is to say, governments should use a large number of money for some essential facilities such as recruiting quality teachers and doing research to develop school education. As a result, far little attention has been paid to other public services includes saving unpopular languages. Furthermore, it seems that having only one language is cheaper and more efficient for the country because of costs of investment. last sentence is not necessary, off topic, give one reason why government cannot invest money and explain with examples.

sample; On the one hand, there are several reasons why people argue that government should not spend some money on saving less popular languages. The main reason is that there are other essential areas need big investment such as food, shelter and employment. For example, in Africa, many citizens are affected by hunger, disease and poverty. When people are dying without proper food, investing money to protect infamous languages cannot be justified. Thus, it is clear why some people have this opinion.


On the other hand, many believe that it is essential for governments to protect unknown languages. As a matter of the fact, languages are not only needed communication but also create vital connections among all people in the whole society. If these languages are preserved and developed, surely the values of traditional customs and the varieties of cultures will be maintained. Moreover, it is a good opportunity for young people to understand the nature of the lesser-known languages widely. By perceiving these languages, the young generation is likely to expect to broaden the effects of using them to other countries. your point of view is not logical and clear, you should say why government should invest money to preserve less known languages

sample: On the other hand, many believe that the government should preserve less known languages. the reason is that it is possible these languages might have important and useful information to humans. For instance, Sanskrit, one of the languages spoken only by a certain group of people in South India, is dramatically disappearing in recent days. These have many typical lessons and notes on how to cure cold and sinus problems permanently. If this language disappears, then the hard work done by ancient people on their research would become void. So for this reason, many argue that lessen spoken languages should be preserved at any cost.

In general, it may save money in the short term if we allow minority languages to disappear, but in the long run this would have negative effects on our cultural heritage. you didn't say what are the negative effects, don't include new ipoints in the conclusion, it should be summarizing your two supporting paragraphs and give your opinion

sample: To sum up, arguments whether to invest money or not to protect less popular languages have strong support. In my opinion, governments have to find a solution to protect all languages by investing less money. Let us hope that people, in the future, would enjoy all different languages which are useful to mankind.


overall, you tried to follow Ryan's model, that's good sign.

Now, try to frame sentences to get full task response. Learn how to answer the question. Go through Ryan.s video again, this time watch out how to get full task response.

The above essay looks band 5 to 5.5 ( I am not an assessor)