Pls check my task 1 and grade it as my exam was on 7 June

[Mayuri patel]

You rented a car from car rental company. The air conditioner has stopped working. You phoned the company a week ago but it has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter
Introduce yourself
Explain the situation
Say what action you would like the company to take
Dear sir/madam,
My name is Mr. Peter Johnson and I am a software engineer. The reasons I am writing to you is technical problem that I faced due to hired car, which I rented from your company two weeks ago. After only three times it was in use, problems started to appear.
The first malfunction that I noticed was the slow cooling effect of the air condition, it takes too much time to drop the warm temperature. I neglect this problem and continue its usage, suddenly it stop working during our journey and since then I were unable to use it. I was very surprised to discover such problems in your services.
Naturally, after coming back from tour I called your company to either repair the car or replace it with another one. Your assistant said that it I would have to wait for two days for the process. After two days the car had still not repaired.
I am very disappointed with both the equipment and the service have I received. Therefore I expect a full refund of 2000$ as soon as possible which I have gave to you as a deposit.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours faithfully
Mr. Peter.

[dalsingh]

If I will get a chance to write the same answer. Please Check my answer too... and grade me as I am also going to appear for exam on 7th June.

I am writing a letter regarding the issue in air-condition of the car, which I borrowed from you on rent on 20 May 2014 by the name of Daljit having file number J258. The car's Air condition is not working after from last 8 days, even I had launched the complaint to your help desk.

The issue raised when I took that car towards the hills last week. The roads were to weird. As I traveled 50-60 Km of my journey I just stopped at a restaurant for lunch. After getting into the car when I Tried to power on the air-conditioned it stopped working. After little try I was so frustrated and the heat of sun made me panic. Then I just called your company help desk number regarding the concern. The executive commits to get this problem done in 24 hours.

Now, I am waiting for the resolution of this fault of air condition from your company. As I have given the security and the advance of one month to your company includes the servicing cost of such damage. So, please get this repaired by the end of the weekend or replace this with another good condition car of this category. Not doing so will leads me to launch a complaint against your company. Your prompt reply is awaited.

Yours Sincerely 28 May 2014
Daljit Singh

[allen_zhang]

Hi Maryuri,
I am trying to check a little for you.
Please keep in mind that I am also an IELTS test taker and my writing is also not that good.

You rented a car from car rental company. The air conditioner has stopped working. You phoned the company a week ago but it has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter
Introduce yourself
Explain the situation
Say what action you would like the company to take
Dear sir/madam,
My name is Mr. Peter Johnson and I am a software engineer.(I am a software engineer too, but I don't think the man in the car rental company need to know that.) The reasons--> reason, because you use "is" later in this sentence (why) I am writing to you is (a) technical problem that I faced due to --> about the hired car, which(remove it) I rented from your company two weeks ago. After only three times it was in use-->used, problems started to appear.
The first malfunction that I noticed was the slow -->poor cooling effect of the air conditioner, it takes too much time to drop the warm remove it temperature. I neglect this problem and continue its usage, suddenly it stopped working during our journey (what journey?)and since then I were unable to use it. I was very surprised to discover such problems in your services.

Naturally, after coming back from my tour I called your company and ask you to either repair the car or replace it with another one. Your assistant said that it remove it I would have to wait for two days for the process. After two days the car had still not repaired.
I am very disappointed with both the equipment and the service have I--> I received. Therefore, I expect a full refund of or=#FF4000]the[/color] 2000$ as soon as possible which I have remove itgave to you as a deposit.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours faithfully
Mr. Peter.--> Peter. You should not write "Mr." here, that's for showing courtesy to others.

As I am not a examiner, I don't know where to put your essay. 5? 5.5?
Generally, Grammatical errors can be seen in most sentences and some wording choices seem awkward. However, I know what you are talking about and you have delivered the message to me clearly.