There are many different reasons that can keep a person in their workplace. Some believe that money is the main reason.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?
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In today’s economic situation, there are many reasons why people tend to keep working for their organization. While some opine that competitive package is the main reason, others believe that there are other different elements associated with it. To my mind, job security is likewise one of the reasons in addition to income.
To begin with, money plays a significant role to the employee because salary is mandatory to run the life without any hassle. For instance, a friend of mine works as a Warehouse operator at Aldi, Australia even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree. The ground is he earns a salary two times higher than an engineer at his level and, as a result, he can enjoy his life with such high income. From this case, it is clear that a good pay keeps employees with their employer.
Furthermore, job security, in my belief, is also an important factor that some of the workers look for. For example, although many government jobs in India still have low income, Indians intend to hold these jobs because these are considered to be a lifetime job. With such a secured job, individuals plan their expenses and would enjoy their life with full stability. Therefore, job security is also one of the factors that make a person keeps their workplace.
To sum up, there are different concerns from people when they want to forge for a company. To my brain, other than money, permanent job could also be the reason for employees to work for their company.
task 2< workplace_ money>
task 2< workplace_ money>
JAN 2014 L 8.5 R 8 W 6.5 S 6.5
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
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allen_zhang
- Posts: 362
- Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2014 2:41 am
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
There are many different reasons that can keep a person in their workplace. Some believe that money is the main reason.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In today’s economic situation, there are many reasons why people tend to keep working for their organization. While some opine that competitive package is the main reason, others believe that there are other different elements associated with it. To my mind, job security is likewise one of the reasons in addition to income.
#1 I am not sure about "package ", can it be used to refer to "salary"?
#2 change the second "reason" to "factor" or even "motivator"
#3 even if you said "job security is likewise one of the reasons in addition to income", you still didn't answer if the money is the main reason or not. It would be better if you say that something other is more important or even just equally important.
To begin with, money plays a significant role to the employee because salary is mandatory to run the life without any hassle. For instance, a friend of mine works as a Warehouse operator at Aldi, Australia even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree. The ground is he earns a salary two times higher than an engineer at his level and, as a result, he can enjoy his life with such high income. From this case, it is clear that a good pay keeps employees with their employer.
#4 To me, your example seems to be too personal. Are you sure he can represent other people?
#5 money plays a significant role to the employee. money plays a role to employee? not good, should be "Money plays a role in employee's job satisfaction" or "Money plays a role to keep employee in their workplace."
#6 Australia even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree.
This sentence is ambiguous. Should people with a university degree be well paid or bad paid? If we assume that they deserve good money, then they must now having a bad salary according to your sentence.
Furthermore, job security, in my belief, is also an important factor that some of the workers look for. For example, although many government jobs in India still have low income, Indians intend to hold these jobs because these are considered to be a lifetime job. With such a secured job, individuals plan their expenses and would enjoy their life with full stability. Therefore, job security is also one of the factors that make a person keeps their workplace.
#7 some of the workers look for --> some workers look for.
#8 individuals plan their expenses and would enjoy their life with full stability. This sentence is not good enough. try "with such a secured job, employees could better plan there expenses and therefore, could provide..".
To sum up, there are different concerns from people when they want to forge for a company. To my brain, other than money, permanent job could also be the reason for employees to work for their company.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In today’s economic situation, there are many reasons why people tend to keep working for their organization. While some opine that competitive package is the main reason, others believe that there are other different elements associated with it. To my mind, job security is likewise one of the reasons in addition to income.
#1 I am not sure about "package ", can it be used to refer to "salary"?
#2 change the second "reason" to "factor" or even "motivator"
#3 even if you said "job security is likewise one of the reasons in addition to income", you still didn't answer if the money is the main reason or not. It would be better if you say that something other is more important or even just equally important.
To begin with, money plays a significant role to the employee because salary is mandatory to run the life without any hassle. For instance, a friend of mine works as a Warehouse operator at Aldi, Australia even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree. The ground is he earns a salary two times higher than an engineer at his level and, as a result, he can enjoy his life with such high income. From this case, it is clear that a good pay keeps employees with their employer.
#4 To me, your example seems to be too personal. Are you sure he can represent other people?
#5 money plays a significant role to the employee. money plays a role to employee? not good, should be "Money plays a role in employee's job satisfaction" or "Money plays a role to keep employee in their workplace."
#6 Australia even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree.
This sentence is ambiguous. Should people with a university degree be well paid or bad paid? If we assume that they deserve good money, then they must now having a bad salary according to your sentence.
Furthermore, job security, in my belief, is also an important factor that some of the workers look for. For example, although many government jobs in India still have low income, Indians intend to hold these jobs because these are considered to be a lifetime job. With such a secured job, individuals plan their expenses and would enjoy their life with full stability. Therefore, job security is also one of the factors that make a person keeps their workplace.
#7 some of the workers look for --> some workers look for.
#8 individuals plan their expenses and would enjoy their life with full stability. This sentence is not good enough. try "with such a secured job, employees could better plan there expenses and therefore, could provide..".
To sum up, there are different concerns from people when they want to forge for a company. To my brain, other than money, permanent job could also be the reason for employees to work for their company.
#1 2013-09-07 L7.5; R8; S6; W6
#2 2014-03-08 L7.5; R7; S7; W5.5
#3 2014-05-10 L7.5; R8; S6.5; W6
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S5.5; W7
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S7; W5.5
#2 2014-03-08 L7.5; R7; S7; W5.5
#3 2014-05-10 L7.5; R8; S6.5; W6
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S5.5; W7
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S7; W5.5
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
Hi Allen,
Thanks for your comments. I have something to say..
1. ' package ' is a word similar to salary
2. I accept to use other synonyms
3. " To my mind, job security is also equally important as like money." i it ok now?
4.From Ryan's video , he explained many personal examples, one time I got band 7 in writing and that time I used my nephew in my example, so I assume it works.
5.agree
6. It means, the job does not relate to his studies, so even though it is not related , he works because of his income. Actually, it is my life, I work as a WH operator and stick to that job because the pay is 40$ an hour whereas IT engineer earns 29$ per hour which is my friend. so i sacrificed my profession due to high income.
7. agree
8.agree
Durai
Thanks for your comments. I have something to say..
1. ' package ' is a word similar to salary
2. I accept to use other synonyms
3. " To my mind, job security is also equally important as like money." i it ok now?
4.From Ryan's video , he explained many personal examples, one time I got band 7 in writing and that time I used my nephew in my example, so I assume it works.
5.agree
6. It means, the job does not relate to his studies, so even though it is not related , he works because of his income. Actually, it is my life, I work as a WH operator and stick to that job because the pay is 40$ an hour whereas IT engineer earns 29$ per hour which is my friend. so i sacrificed my profession due to high income.
7. agree
8.agree
Durai
JAN 2014 L 8.5 R 8 W 6.5 S 6.5
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
Hi Durai
Are u in Australia, I am also here.
When are you taking exam
Are u in Australia, I am also here.
When are you taking exam
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
No Candy,
At present i am living in my hometown, Coimbatore India.
I lived in Australia from 2008 to 2013, now looking to get PR.
I am taking the test on 21st June.
Regards
Durai
At present i am living in my hometown, Coimbatore India.
I lived in Australia from 2008 to 2013, now looking to get PR.
I am taking the test on 21st June.
Regards
Durai
JAN 2014 L 8.5 R 8 W 6.5 S 6.5
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
FEB 2014 L 8 R 8 W 7 S 6.5
APR 2014 L 8 R 9 W 6.5 S 7
JUN 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6
July 2014 L 8.5 R 7 W 6.5 S 6.5
OCT 2014 L 7.5 R 7 W 7 S 7
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
Hey
That is great
You have good writing skills and you will definitely clear this exam
All the very best
Regards
Chandni
That is great
You have good writing skills and you will definitely clear this exam
All the very best
Regards
Chandni
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allen_zhang
- Posts: 362
- Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2014 2:41 am
Re: task 2< workplace_ money>
If I will finally pass my IELTS test and go to Australia, I would probably make the same decision as yours.
Back to #6 even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree.
I feel "negatively correlate" sounds not nature.
How about "totally irrelevant to his university degree"?
Back to #6 even though the job negatively correlates with his university degree.
I feel "negatively correlate" sounds not nature.
How about "totally irrelevant to his university degree"?
#1 2013-09-07 L7.5; R8; S6; W6
#2 2014-03-08 L7.5; R7; S7; W5.5
#3 2014-05-10 L7.5; R8; S6.5; W6
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S5.5; W7
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S7; W5.5
#2 2014-03-08 L7.5; R7; S7; W5.5
#3 2014-05-10 L7.5; R8; S6.5; W6
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S5.5; W7
#4 2014-06-21 L7.5; R6.5; S7; W5.5