Please Analyze my essay

[saqibali]

The controversial effects of advertisement on our society have always been a hot discussion topic. Critics even demand a complete prohibition of all forms of advertisements citing its effects on focus and energy level of audience. Both views are being discussed below before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.

To critics, advertisement has detrimental impacts on our society. For example, vulgar advertisement although sell products but it also encourages impeachments of our moral values. Secondly, advertisement cultivates a status conscientiousness among our society members which in turn give birth to desperation and hence crimes. Thirdly, advertisement diverts our attention from more important goals and sometimes even causes accidents. A report published by The New York Times in 1999, demonstrated that the traffic accidents rates were higher on advertisement bombarded roads. So the negative effects of advertisements can be seen.

To the positive camp, advertisement encourages a positive competition among companies which in turn derives a more competent solution to their customers. For instance, advertisement gives opportunity to any company to communicate its positive points to customers and hence help customer make a better decision. Further the advertisement encourages a better sense of beauty among society members. The status conscientiousness motivates society members work hard and achiever higher. As Washington Post published in 2002, advertisement encourages society members to aim higher and achiever higher. Thus the positive effects of advertisement can be projects.
To recap, analyzing both sides of the picture its clear, advertisement has positive as well as negative effects on society. Advertisement should be controlled by a government authority so that its positive effects could be harnessed and negative could be mitigated.

[Flick]

The controversial effects of advertisement on our society have always been a hot discussion topic. Critics even demand a complete prohibition of all forms of advertisements citing its effects on focus and energy level of audience. Both views are being discussed below before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.

To critics, advertisements have a detrimental impact on our society. For example, vulgar advertisements do sell products but they also encourage impeachments of our moral values. Secondly, advertising cultivates a status conscientiousness (<-- I don't understand your meaning.) among our society members which in turn gives birth to desperation and hence crime. Thirdly, advertising diverts our attention from more important goals and sometimes even causes accidents. A report published by The New York Times in 1999 demonstrated that the traffic accidents rates were higher on advertisement bombarded roads. (<-- This is a good example.) So the negative effects of advertisements can be seen.

To the positive camp, advertising encourages positive competition among companies which in turn leads to a more competent solution for their customers. For instance, advertising gives an opportunity to any company to communicate its positive points to customers and hence help customers make a better decision. Further, advertisements encourags a better sense of beauty among society members. The status conscientiousness (<-- Again, I'm not sure what this means.) motivates society members to work hard and achieve more. As Washington Post published in 2002, advertising encourages society members to aim higher and achieve more. (<-- This is a repeat of your previous sentence. It doesn't explain how it encourages these things.) Thus the positive effects of advertisements can be projected.
To recap, it is clear that advertising has positive as well as negative effects on society. Advertisements should be controlled by a government authority so that its positive effects could be harnessed and negative could be mitigated.

Advertisement is a noun, advertising (to advertise) is a verb.

[saqibali]

This helped.
thanks a lot.
Can you kindly give me band?