Writing Task 2

[prabhjot kaur]

MORE AND MORE PEOPLE WORK AT HOME AND STUDY AT HOME WITH THE DEVELOPMENT OF COMPUTER TECHNOLOGY.
DO YOU THINK IT IS A POSITIVE OR A NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?


Technology has provided utmost facilities to our world.It is irrefutable that life has become luxurious rather than fifty years prior due to progression of technology.With the help of computers and phones it is easy to do study or work at home.But there are some positive as well negatives effects on individual to study online or work at home.In the following paragraphs i am going to describe it.

First of all i would give some facts about positivity of online study.As we all know prices are hiking in every field of life so it is
comfortable to do study online because there is no need to commute anywhere,by doing this we can save money of transportation.Moreover an individual can continue her/his job along with her/his study to tackle with everyday expenses.

Moreover if person performs his/her work at home he/she would be able to save quality and quantity time for other activities
such as hobbies.Traffic problem is getting giant everyday therefore if one would stay at home and registers online for study or
does work at home then it is sure that roads will get some relaxation.

On the contrary,if we say that study or work is a social act as well social behavior then nothing wrong because if every single person would study online,who will go to schools and Universities to get enroll.Definitely they going to be closed then consequence will be disastrous in form of unemployment .If we encourage to people for working at home then it would create
desolation in offices,an individual would not be able to grasp value of time and punctuality and might loose the spirit of teamwork and discipline.

In the conclusion,i would like to say to do study online or work at home has both pros and cons.There is no doubt that computer
technology has become indispensable part of human life but on the other hand it prevailed aloofness in all over the world.But its positivity outweigh the negativity.

[Pkhatawa]

Ideas are interesting. Essay structure is fine. Introduction creates an expectation for the following paragraphs. Two paragraphs to explain the positive side and one more paragraph to state the negative side. Conclusive view votes to the positive side. You may please like to give attention to using appropriate words in the context. E.g. luxurious, progression of technology, prices are hiking, save money of transportation, tackle with everyday expenses, quality and quantity time etc. You may like to replace them with: comfortable, advanced technology, cost is ever increasing, transportation expenses / conveyance expenses, save daily expenses, able to spare quality time. Best luck!

[siddharthkanoj]

-- Your attempt was good. With effective introduction and paragraphing.
And you catered both the aspects f the statement.

Below is my attempt. (Please comment and suggest on any correction to be made)--

I am in consummate accord with the statement that, there is a sharp increase in the usage of computers for work at home as well as for study at home; it’s the outcome of the ongoing introduction and up-gradation of computer technology.

Earlier, people used to visit their work place and schools/colleges, for work and study respectively. The physical presence of person in his/her respective work place helped in enhancing the efficiency in their output. Furthermore, the person’s activity was supervised by their bosses and teachers, which improved the factor of discipline in them. Moreover, the physical presence of person entails the effective control on their actions by their supervisors.

In contrast, with an introduction of computer technology, People are facilitated to avoid being present in-person and thus, accomplish their task online by sitting in their respective places. Now, it is easier for everyone to keep a check on his or her work or studies by being in comfort zone. Moreover, the introduction of e-learning programs and modules has enabled many visually impaired and disabled students to be in touch with studies, just in being at home. On other hand, the housewives are also being facilitated by this technological advancement as they can improve their knowledge without traveling.

The benefits of the computer technology can be enumerated further.
Firstly, One can save on his/her traveling expenses by being at home.
Secondly, The technology is user-friendly and therefore, everyone can use it without any hassle. And Lastly, its reach is enormous and thus, a person living in far-off village can study or work at his/her place.

In the end, I would like to conclude that, the introduction of computer technology has benefited a large section of the society and therefore, its impact is positive.
Further, it could be recommended that, use of technology should be encouraged in every Village, District, Town, State and Country, in order to cater everyone’s need.

[prabhjot kaur]

hi siddharth...
thanks for giving feedback,i wish that i could be able to write as u suggested..

[siddharthkanoj]

My pleasure

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Are you going to appear for the IELTS soon ?

[prabhjot kaur]

yess,i am going to appear in ielts on 2nd of august.

[Ravian]

Dear Prabjhot,
Just went through your piece of writing, in my viewpoint there are two sorts of discrepancies. For instance, a bit grammar mistakes along-with misty conclusion.

[prabhjot kaur]

thanks Ravian for evaluating my writing,i will try to overcome my mistakes.