Pls correct my essay on international tourism

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SaraZh
Posts: 14
Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2014 10:52 am

Pls correct my essay on international tourism

Post by SaraZh »

Topic: International tourism has become the biggest industry in the world. Some people think it cause tension between people from different culture. Others thing it leads to understanding between countries. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

International tourism industry has grown rapidly in the latest fifty years in terms of the expanding number of people who travel aboard and the increasing distance they travel. Arguments of the influence of international tourism on the relationship between local people and foreigners seem never come to an end.

The opponents of international tourism argue that it can have detrimental effects on the local environment and customs, which eventually lead to disagreements between the locals and the tourists and conflicts in some extreme cases. Though it is true that tourists contribute to the local economics, more and more evidence has been found that the natural environment is deteriorating as large areas of forests and beaches have been replaced by hotels, guesthouses and tourist centers. Additionally, some tourists simply lack of the senses of showing respect to the local customs and religious traditions; it can be a serious offense if they do not behave and hence tension between the tourists and the locals arises.

Nevertheless, I believe that most of the tourists are genuine who merely desire to experience cultures that are remote from their own. In fact, there is no better way to understand a foreign culture than visiting or even living in the foreign country. In return, local people can learn foreign languages and expand their horizon by communicating with visitors. Only through interactions can people from diverse cultures diminish stereotypes of and discrimination against each others.

After all the above discussion, one thing is certain: international tourism will continue to grow as a result of the development of transport and economy. To tackle the problems caused by international tourism, government intervention is needed, for example construction permits and sufficient guidance of things must-not-do. Besides, tourists should read the guidebook before arrival and always be careful of their behaviors during the journey.
Manugoyal123
Posts: 5
Joined: Wed Jul 23, 2014 12:53 pm

Re: Pls correct my essay on international tourism

Post by Manugoyal123 »

Although I am not an expertise in evaluation of writing. But still i tried to improve your essay with my knowledge. Hopefully it would be helpful for you. :D
International tourism industry has grown rapidly in the last fifty years in terms of the expanding number of people who travel to explore new places and cultures of different countries. Argument over whether or not international tourism have negatively influenced the relationship between local people and foreigners seem never come to an end.

The opponents of international tourism argue that it can have detrimental effects on the local environment and customs, on which disagreements happen between the locals and the tourists and eventually lead to conflicts in some extreme cases. Although it is true that tourists contribute handsomely to the local economics, more and more evidence has been found that the tourist location's natural envoirment is deteriorating as large part of forests and beaches have been replaced by the facilities like hotels, guesthouses and tourist centers. Additionally, some tourists simply lack sense of showing respect to the local rituals and religious traditions; it could be a serious offense if they do not behave and subsequently create tension between them.

Nevertheless, I believe that most of the tourists are genuine who merely wish to experience cultures that are remote from their own. In fact, there is no better way to understand a foreign culture rather than visiting or even living in the foreign country. In return, local people could learn foreign languages and expand their horizon by communicating with visitors. Only through positive interactions, people from diverse cultures really could diminish stereotypes of and discrimination against each others.

After all the above discussion, one thing is certain: international tourism will continue to grow through the advances in technology, transportation and communication. To tackle this issue, government intervention is required, such as construction permits and sufficient guideline over things that must-not-do by both side of people. Besides, tourists should read the guidebook before arrival and always be careful of their behaviors during the journey.
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