Writing Task 2 -Today, the quality of life in large cities.

[charles205]

Writing Task 2 question
Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions.

Answer:

The degradation of life indices of major cities has drawn the attention nowadays. The reasons for this seem to be varied and relocating industries and modern city planning will be evaluated as potential strategies for their viability.

First, non- value adding industries play an important role in reducing living standards. It is common to find several facilities in and around cities, occupying larger amount of space, limiting the opportunity for highly demanding new human requirements. For an example, in Colombo Sri Lanka large amount of land was rescued recently by demolishing several old building complexes, and a handful of state of the art shopping malls have been built instead. These new developments have resulted in increased consumer satisfaction among both locals and foreigners. Thus, it is clear how smart decisions on relocating some industries can help the situation.

Secondly, the lack of social activities can bring down the level of human life. The opportunity to build social interactions can help to improve the social and physical levels of citizens. For an instance, the most peaceful city in 2013, Geneva, possess enough public parks, theaters and art galleries. The more people visit these places, the more their values are improved. As this shows, increase in social interactions would result in higher standards of living.

In conclusion, after this analyze, it is clear that re-engineering of existing facilities and introduction of new social centers would help to tackle the problem of lower living standards in big cities. If these strategies are opted, people would have more and more quality city lives in future.

[charles205]

Hi Everyone,
I am trying to reach band 7 for writing. I took the exam twice and end up with 6.5 for writing. Please comment and help me to improve.

Thanks in advance.

[AwolsESL]

On first appearances your answer looks above a 6.5 to me, but actually it's quite hard to follow - in particular the first body paragraph.
What is a non-value adding industry? Surely every industry adds some value to a city? Or you mean it doesn't add value to living standards - in which case it is irrelevant to non-value adding in a sentence which also says they reduce living standards. Then your example is confusing because it is not about an industry but empty buildings. What is the industry being relocated? Your paragraph just doesn't add up.
Coherence I would guess is the main problem you are having. You need to check through you paragraphs to make sure that the main idea, development and examples all represent the same idea.

[masudsust07]

With the recent developments in technology like e-books, some people feel that printed media like books, newspapers, and magazines will soon be a thing of the past. Others feel that these forms of media will never disappear. What is your opinion?

In the modern world, the advancement of technology is conquering every corner of our lives. Even the reading habit of a person is influenced by modern technology. This is evident from the popularity of electronic books, online newspapers and journals. Although , this development gives birth of a notion that traditional printed books , newspaper or journal would no longer be used in the future , I believe that these types of mass media never loses its appeal to general people.

Firstly, it is true that the first growing information technology is providing the people with the real time valuable information with a click of a computer’s mouse. The invention of internet paves the way for readers to find news within a minute from any parts of the world. This has significantly saves the time and energy of the readers. Moreover, online newspaper provides on demand news service, which is not possible in case of printed-paper.

A second reason is that people do not need to carry a heavy book or large sized newspaper in their bags any more. This is possible because of the creation of online bookstores such as Amazon which offering an opportunity to readers to read book even when they are in travel.

Another most important matter for getting more popularity of the online mass media is its eco-friendly nature. This type of media is actually saving the environment by reducing the need of woods that are used for the printing purpose. As the people are now more concern about the global warming they are increasingly choosing the online version of mass media and detach them from traditional forms of media.

However, the appeal for reading printed books and newspaper will remain same to many people.The pleasure of touching and feelings of printed books is something beyond description. For instance, i like to read printed Nobel book because it gives me relaxing mood and takes me in a dreamland when i look through the pictures of the book. This kind of feelings cannot be found in computer screen. In addition to this, many people collect books to give it to another person as a gift or just as to keep it as a souvenir. Above all, not all of the people are well equipped with technology that needed to get access to online services. So they are still depend on the printed version of mass media.

In conclusion, my opinion is that the application of Smartphone and computer will certainly dominate the people’s choice of reading in the upcoming days, but the reader’s love for printed media will not be entirely vanished as it provides them a scope to escape from stress in their busy life.

[charles205]

Hi AwolsEsl,
Thanks for the comment. I agree with you,the examples could have been more relevant and elaborated. I think it is because of lesser ideas I could gathered during the brainstorming session.

Others, comment pls.
Best regards
Charles205

[saqibali]

Spot these erros
First >Firstly

[charles205]

It is ok to use firstly, secondly and finally.Isn't it?