Aiming at 7.5 above. Please help to assess as i plan to take the test in 2 weeks time. Thanks!

[plin0627]

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In recent years, as globalisation improves trades around the world, people can now purchase the same products freely. Such development raises a debate that whether it is a positive trend or not. This paper will articulate both sides before came into a conclusion.

Undoubtedly, having the opportunity to buy any items we want without have to worry where to buy is one great relief to most shoppers. The convenient gives shoppers an equal chance of shopping and that they do not have to travel abroad to buy their dreams products. For instance, anyone whose affordable can buy luxurious items like Gucci bags in their own countries. This has then help people save their travel time and money effectively.

In addition to this, one great merit of wide availability is that it supports the sellers and organisations in gaining higher profit. This means a country’s economy would also be developed and improved accordingly when the purchase’s demand and supply are both increased.

However, such development might also cause generalisation of one brand that is originally unique and special. There are certain products that created solely to a specific group of buyers. Take Louise Vuitton as an example, although this brand is considerably high-end, it is slowly losing its uniqueness and its place as a luxurious brand because its products can be found in most nations. This also means that buying from Malaysia or Vietnam has the same shopping experience as in Italy. Eventually, these products will drop from its desired standard in long run.

In sum, generalisation and high availability of a product will only negatively affect minority. Whereas, positively, most levels of stakeholders, namely medium to low income groups, organisations, and even the nations are all benefits from it.

[David.IELTS.Examiner]

Hello!

articulate is strange!

The first main paragraph barely makes sense. Shoppers could be equal just buying their own local goods. As for Gucci, that's not exactly stuff that most people buy. I suggest that if people want to save time and money, they should stop worrying about expensive brand names!

The first sentence of the second main paragraph doesn't make sense. Isn't LV just another Gucci, effectively?

Sorry, but I honestly do not understand this essay. Nowhere near to 7.5 - not even close! The question has not been answered. You keep talking about high-end brands that most people never buy. The grammar makes some sentences incomprehensible. You try to use high-level vocabulary, but it is used inappropriately.

All the best,
David

[Flick]

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In recent years, as globalisation improves trade around the world, people can now purchase the same products freely. Such development has raised a debate as to whether it is a positive trend or not. This paper will consider both sides before coming to a conclusion.

Undoubtedly, having the opportunity to buy any items we want without have to worry where to buy is a great relief to most shoppers. This convenience gives shoppers an equal chance of shopping as they do not have to travel abroad to buy their dream products. For instance, luxury items like Gucci bags can be bought in many countries. This has helped people save time and money effectively.

In addition to this, one great merit of wide availability is that it supports sellers and organisations in making higher profits. This means a country’s economy is also developed and improved accordingly when the product's demand and supply are both increased.

However, such development might also cause the generalisation of a brand that was originally unique and special. There are certain products that are created solely for a specific group of buyers. Take Louis Vuitton as an example. Although this brand is considerably high-end, it is slowly losing its uniqueness and its place as a luxury brand because its products can be found in most nations. This also means that buying from Malaysia or Vietnam has the same shopping experience as in Italy. Eventually, these products will drop from their desired standard.

In summary, generalisation and high availability of a product will only negatively affect a minority. Whereas, positively, most levels of stakeholders, including medium to low income groups, organisations, and even nations all benefit from it.