Over-population is a very serious problem. it affects education, health, traffic and economy. how can the governments solve this problem?
Recently, there has been a considerable surge in the number of population all over the world. This has led to serious ramifications in various fields including education, health, traffic as well as economy. This problem should alert the governments that should have clear plans to tackle it. This will be proven by analyzing possible solutions such as birth control and expanding residential areas.
The most popular solution that usually comes to our minds is encouraging birth control. This is claimed to have incalculable advantages. If people are persuaded to cut back on the number of children, this will certainly bring about financial benefits, and it will also lighten the burden placed upon the families and the governments that are in charge of providing good educational and healthcare systems. Moreover, adopting this solution will significantly improve the overcrowding problem in some countries like Egypt. This reveals the merits of applying that proposed solution.
Furthermore, it is well known that many countries have most of their lands uninhabited; therefore, another suggested solution would be establishing new cities to expand the services provided to the citizens and maximize the effective use of resources. If this concept was implemented in overcrowded communities, cities would show a considerable dump in the number of inhabitants leading to dramatic improvements in the quality of services. Thus, it is clear how expanding residential areas can contribute greatly to the solution of this problem.
After analyzing the above-mentioned suggested solutions, it can be concluded that tackling attempts are not a one-man show. Rather, citizens and officials should exert their utmost efforts to successfully manage this issue.
task 2 response, please evaluate.
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David.IELTS.Examiner
- IELTS Examiner
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Re: task 2 response, please evaluate.
Hello!
Introduction - First sentence - not exactly true. In some European countries, Japan, there has been concern about falling populations. You don't explain the 'ramifications' in your essay.
First main paragraph - Yes, but you need to explain more about this. Besides, in most countries, governments do not provide universal health care and in many countries they do not even provide state education.
Second main paragraph - Again, 'Yes, but ...' Much of the land is used for agriculture and a lot is not suitable for cities.
Conclusion - Weak.
You have the basis of some good points but they are not explained enough. The introduction and conclusion need to be completely rewritten.
There is some good vocabulary and grammar, but it is not used effectively.
All the best,
David
Introduction - First sentence - not exactly true. In some European countries, Japan, there has been concern about falling populations. You don't explain the 'ramifications' in your essay.
First main paragraph - Yes, but you need to explain more about this. Besides, in most countries, governments do not provide universal health care and in many countries they do not even provide state education.
Second main paragraph - Again, 'Yes, but ...' Much of the land is used for agriculture and a lot is not suitable for cities.
Conclusion - Weak.
You have the basis of some good points but they are not explained enough. The introduction and conclusion need to be completely rewritten.
There is some good vocabulary and grammar, but it is not used effectively.
All the best,
David