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Please evaluate and rate my Letter1 (Informal)

Posted: Tue May 09, 2017 11:14 am
by Ghost
Question: You stayed at your friends’ house when you participated in a business seminar in Australia. You left a file with important documents in your room.
Task: Write a letter to your friend, describing the file and ask him/her to return it to you by post.


Response:


Dear Andy,

I hope this letter finds you in best of health. After having a week’s pleasant stay at your place in Australia, yesterday I reached safely in India.

I am writing this letter to inform you regarding a very important file which I left there. I am very much sure that the file would still be on the table inside the room where I stayed for a week. As you might recall, this is the same file, which we carried along with us in the business seminar. Moreover, it also contains few very critical documents pertaining to my new venture. Thus, it is very necessary for me to get it back as soon as possible. I would be very much pleased if you can make some arrangements to send it back at my mailing address via speed post. I hope you can make mail it back at my mailing address without much of bothering. This favor would be highly appreciated.

As already committed by you, I would be waiting for your visit at my hometown. I hope we meet again very soon, and this time in India, so that I can personally thank you for your help in this regard. Looking forward to hearing from you again

Warm Regards,
ABC

Re: Please evaluate and rate my Letter1 (Informal)

Posted: Wed May 10, 2017 5:17 am
by David.IELTS.Examiner
Hello!

Overall, quite a good letter. The description of the file is a little vague, but all points have been covered. You do attempt some complex structures, but there are quite a lot of mistakes in the letter. However, there are some issues with vocabulary, especially ...

express post, not speed
make some arrangements? You mean, post it?
much bother, not much of bothering
As already committed by you???

So, plenty of work needed on the language side.
All the best,
David

Re: Please evaluate and rate my Letter1 (Informal)

Posted: Mon May 29, 2017 9:56 pm
by Flick
Ghost wrote: Tue May 09, 2017 11:14 am Question: You stayed at your friends’ house when you participated in a business seminar in Australia. You left a file with important documents in your room.
Task: Write a letter to your friend, describing the file and ask him/her to return it to you by post.


Response:


Dear Andy,

I hope this letter finds you in the best of health. After having a week’s pleasant stay at your place in Australia, yesterday I returned safely to India.

I am writing this letter to inform you regarding a very important file which I left there.(<--Reword to: "I am writing this letter because I left a very important file at your house.") I am certain that the file would still be on the table inside the room where I stayed for the week. As you might recall, this is the same file we used during the business seminar. Moreover, it also contains some critical documents pertaining to my new venture. Thus, it is very important for me to get it back as soon as possible. I would be very grateful if you could send it back to my mailing address via express post. I hope you can mail it back without too much bother. This favor would be highly appreciated.

As already committed by you, I would be waiting for your visit at my hometown.(<--Reword to: "Don't forget, you have promised to come and visit my hometown.") I hope we meet again very soon, and this time in India, so that I can personally thank you for your help in this regard. Looking forward to hearing from you again.

Warm Regards,
ABC