Hi can any one evaluate this and give me feed back

[indirakumar]

Taking a brief look on the topic at hand, it seems colossally laborious to evaluate whether to control one’s salary to make equal to others’ earnings. However, after proper assimilation of knowledge, I would like to extend my inclination towards the option that government should regulate and set a boundary on the earnings so as to find a stabilized society. The subsequent essay will focus on exploring the three essential reasons in support of my discernment.
To begin with, a colossal income tends to a sophisticated life, only those community gets a good quality education and healthcare which will create a bias in the society. Rest of the people get the substandard education which in turn affects the people. Richer become richer and poorer become poorer. Additionally, money brings power, rich persons rule the country they again become poorer. For instance, in most of the countries, the leaders are rich people. Ordinary people get nothing other than poverty.
However, a high salary reflects on the economic growth of the country. Hefty salaried people pay more tax to the country which reflects on public projects by the government. A huge pay motivates people to devote themselves towards the work and the company. It attracts many talented people toward the company. Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that a majority of people defer from this perspective. The arguments made by them are based on a study report published by the times newspaper padded by a punctilious evaluation. They argue that higher the salary inclines’ the progression of the firm.
However, after considering both the advantages and disadvantages of this immutable and irrefutable topic as well as the multi-faceted aspect of the subject, it can be concluded that the government should take necessary control to limit the salary of an individual in order maintain the stability of the society.

[TheCrystal]

Indra, you have overused too many heavy words but the sense it makes wavers. I think you should pepper your essay with heavy vocabulary but not overdo it. Stick to the topic. Even simpler words can work their magic!

All the Best!