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pls give me a band score Task 2-rent accommodation

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2014 2:14 am
by rairaichan0323
Many people today rent accommodation rather than buy homes. Do advantages of this decision outweigh disadvantages?

In the present day, it seems that more people tend to rent an accommodation instead of buying a house. It is agreed that the benefits of renting an apartment is far outweigh its drawbacks. This argument will be proven by analyzing how renting houses can enhance tenants’ flexibility and diminish their financial constraints.

First of all, it is an indisputable fact that renting houses are much more flexible than buying homes. For instance, people often transform their occupations or even relocate to other cities. This makes it clear that renting apartments are more favorable for them as they can easily move to other places. As this shows that tenants can benefit from renting homes.

Secondly and even more importantly, it is more affordable alternatives for households. To take Hong Kong as an example, the cost of buying houses is incredibly expensive. Not all the families can afford to pay for the exorbitant house’s price. Thus, renting apartments are relatively more affordable. Admittedly, renting homes are insecure as the renters may be forced to move out due to the landlord’s personal reasons. Nevertheless, I personally believe that it is the best way for people who are not able to buy houses due to financial constraints.

Following this look at how the high flexibility of renting apartments and lessening the financial burden, it is proven that its advantages far outweigh its disadvantages. It seems that the tendency of renting houses will continue to become more popular as people are increasingly moving around.

Re: pls give me a band score Task 2-rent accommodation

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2014 10:40 am
by rairaichan0323
anyone can give me comment? :D

Re: pls give me a band score Task 2-rent accommodation

Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2014 10:02 am
by Flick
rairaichan0323 wrote:Many people today rent accommodation rather than buy homes. Do advantages of this decision outweigh disadvantages?

In the present day, it seems that more people tend to rent accommodation instead of buying a house. I believe that the benefits of renting an apartment far outweigh the drawbacks. This argument will be proven by analyzing how renting houses can enhance tenants’ flexibility and diminish their financial constraints.

First of all, it is an indisputable fact that renting a house is much more flexible than buying a home. (<-- Use singular here, ie. renting a house, rather than plural, ie. renting houses, because you are discussing an individual who isn't renting or buying more than one house.) For instance, people often changetheir occupations or even relocate to other cities. (<-- this is very well put!) This makes it clear that renting an apartment is more convenient for them as they can easily move to other places. This shows just one benefit of renting.

Secondly, and even more importantly, renting is a more affordable alternative for many households. Take Hong Kong as an example. The cost of buying a house is incredibly expensive. Not all families can afford to pay the exorbitant house price. Thus, renting an apartment is more affordable. Admittedly, renting a home can be insecure as the renters may be forced to move out due to the landlord’s personal reasons. Nevertheless, I personally believe that it is the best way for people who are not able to buy houses due to financial constraints.

In summary, the high flexibility of renting an apartment and the lower financial burden, it is clear that the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages. It seems that the trend of renting houses will continue to be popular as people are increasingly moving around.
Hi rairaichan0323,

I really like the layout of your essay. You introduce the topic well, discuss the pros and cons then give a good conclusion, clearly stating your opinion. Great job! I can't give you a band score (Ryan has a better understanding of the band system), but you should be very happy with this essay!

Flick

Re: pls give me a band score Task 2-rent accommodation

Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2014 10:17 am
by rairaichan0323
thank you Flick!!! :D