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Can someone mark my answer and tell me what mark i would get for the write up.

I have attached a screenshot of the question.

The above diagram illustrates maps on an island before and after the construction for tourism. Prior to the construction the island was deserted. However, it now consist of a restaurant, a reception and several beach cabanas for accommodation. Vehicle tracks leading from the restaurant to and around the reception is constructed. The left side of the island is densely packed with beach cabanas but the right side of the island is yet to be occupied. after the construction, the beach is used for swimming. there’s a small foot path that’s leading to the beach from the cabanas. A pier has been constructed on the south part of the island where yachts are seen sailing. Patches of coconut trees on the island are seen before and after the construction therefore could deduced that none of the tree’s were destroyed during the construction. We could come to a conclusion that there’s a vast amount of development on the island while preserving the environment.

Hi,

I've had a look at your writing task 1. Here are some comments on each criteria which the IELTS examiner will mark you on:

Task Achievement: You have given details of the changes between the two maps. You also have an overview. You would get about band score 7 for this.

Coherence and Cohesion: At present you would get about band score 5 for this. Where are your paragraphs?? Luckily, it can be very easily improved by using paragraphs. Your ability to organise information into paragraphs and use linking devices is 25% of your marks. You report should consist of the following paragraphs (they will not all be the same length):

1 introduction
2. overall statement ("Overall, prior to the construction the island was deserted but after construction of a tourist resort it now consists of a restaurant, a reception and several beach cabanas for accommodation.")
3. Body paragraph A (detailed information)
4. Body Pargraph B (detailed information)

You must decide how to divide the body. You could divide it by location (east and west) or by types of changes (buildings and facilities).

Vocabulary: You show a good range of less common vocabulary but you also have some errors - so that's about 6.5.

Grammar: You use good complex sentence structures as well as a range of grammar tenses. There are a few errors so either 6.5 or 7.

I hope that helps you. You are doing really well and if you just use paragraphs to organise your report, you'll be fine.

All the best,
Liz

Thank you Liz. My exam is on Saturday and i need to improve myself so i end up with a 8 for each band.

Here is my answer to same question,

The island approximately is 200 meter in long and it's width differs accordingly approximately from 50 meter to 20 meter. Island have not much plant population. The middle part is almost out of any tree, although some small groups of trees can be seen on sides. A natural beach can be seen on left side of island while interactions between sea and island have created a proper geographical condition for having pier, in bottom side of island.
After construction, a restaurant, a reception and many bungalows is positioned without any change in plant population and prior geographical conditions of island. A pier have been constructed in the proper position as mentioned above which is respectively connected to reception and restaurant facilities via vehicle track. These facilities are positioned in the middle of the island. As accommodation places, total number of 15 bungalows are constructed on both sides of reception building. They have been divided to 2 groups of 9 and 6 bungalows respectively on right and left side. Footpaths are located between accommodation places and also a footpath guides visitors toward beach which is suitable for swimming.