Hi all,
"In some countries, small town-centre shops are going out of business because people tend to drive to large out-of-town stores. As a result, people without cars have limited access to out-of town stores, and it may result in an increase in the use of cars. Do you think the disadvantages of this change outweigh its advantages?"
Okay, I got this question from another thread and attempted to write an essay to response to it, but I am really now confused how should I understand it. Is it about advantages/disadvantages of increasing number of private car use or it is about the effects of the moving the shopping centers to the outskirts of the cities?
Please discuss!
Chi
I need your opinion on how to understand this question
Re: I need your opinion on how to understand this question
Okay, I decided to go ahead and wrote the essay anyway.
Here is my essay, please read and comment.
I will go through it once more with "my instructor" and will post the corrected version. I believe you guys can learn from my mistakes as well, and might be good if someone can still point out some mistakes from the corrected version.
FYI, I try to do a breakdown of what to say in each paragraph for every essay. I find it useful and it is something we should do briefly on the test so we can stay focus.
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1. Introduction: State your position – I strongly believe that the moving of the shopping centers to outskirts of town increases car use due to the need to travel to the shopping centers creates more benefits than negative effects .
2. Paragraph 1: cars concentration is spread out
3. Paragraph 2: increase car use is good for car industry, and create jobs
4. Conclusion: Restate the introduction
Nowadays, in many countries, large shopping centers are built out of town where there is more space and property is not as pricy as in the center. These shopping complexes are great attractions as they contain a larger selection and a wide range of world class brand names. Consequently, this makes people drive out of town and encourages people who have not yet owned a car to buy one. Increase in car use is commonly marked with traffic and pollution problems, however I believe it is not always the case because it can actually resolve traffic problems and create more jobs in the car industry.
For one, having people drive to the outskirts of the cities helps spread out the traffic, hence reduce traffic congestion in the center. Let’s take Hanoi, a developing city in South East Asia which is similar to many other developing cities, as an example. In the last ten years, Hanoi has to deal with the increasing traffic problems due to the dramatic raise in population. After building the shopping centers in the city outskirts, the traffic has been considerably reduced in the city inner which is a great benefit of making people to drive out of town for shopping.
In addition to this, increasing demand of cars is directly beneficial to the car industry and the economy due to the number of jobs it creates. Let’s go back to the example of Hanoi. Because of the increase in demand for cars, big car makers such as Toyota and Honda have established their factories in a nearby province which created thousands of jobs for young people who were unemployed. This exemplifies that moving the shopping centers to the city outskirts can lead to a positive effect towards the society and the economy.
In summary, according to this view, it can be concluded that moving the complex shopping centers to the city outskirts which leads to increase in car ownership can simultaneously ease the traffic problem within the city and reduce unemployment. The positive nature of these benefits makes it clear that the advantages of this change by far outweigh the disadvantages that it might bring about. Hopefully this trend of development will continue to be implemented.
Here is my essay, please read and comment.
I will go through it once more with "my instructor" and will post the corrected version. I believe you guys can learn from my mistakes as well, and might be good if someone can still point out some mistakes from the corrected version.
FYI, I try to do a breakdown of what to say in each paragraph for every essay. I find it useful and it is something we should do briefly on the test so we can stay focus.
--------------------------------------
1. Introduction: State your position – I strongly believe that the moving of the shopping centers to outskirts of town increases car use due to the need to travel to the shopping centers creates more benefits than negative effects .
2. Paragraph 1: cars concentration is spread out
3. Paragraph 2: increase car use is good for car industry, and create jobs
4. Conclusion: Restate the introduction
Nowadays, in many countries, large shopping centers are built out of town where there is more space and property is not as pricy as in the center. These shopping complexes are great attractions as they contain a larger selection and a wide range of world class brand names. Consequently, this makes people drive out of town and encourages people who have not yet owned a car to buy one. Increase in car use is commonly marked with traffic and pollution problems, however I believe it is not always the case because it can actually resolve traffic problems and create more jobs in the car industry.
For one, having people drive to the outskirts of the cities helps spread out the traffic, hence reduce traffic congestion in the center. Let’s take Hanoi, a developing city in South East Asia which is similar to many other developing cities, as an example. In the last ten years, Hanoi has to deal with the increasing traffic problems due to the dramatic raise in population. After building the shopping centers in the city outskirts, the traffic has been considerably reduced in the city inner which is a great benefit of making people to drive out of town for shopping.
In addition to this, increasing demand of cars is directly beneficial to the car industry and the economy due to the number of jobs it creates. Let’s go back to the example of Hanoi. Because of the increase in demand for cars, big car makers such as Toyota and Honda have established their factories in a nearby province which created thousands of jobs for young people who were unemployed. This exemplifies that moving the shopping centers to the city outskirts can lead to a positive effect towards the society and the economy.
In summary, according to this view, it can be concluded that moving the complex shopping centers to the city outskirts which leads to increase in car ownership can simultaneously ease the traffic problem within the city and reduce unemployment. The positive nature of these benefits makes it clear that the advantages of this change by far outweigh the disadvantages that it might bring about. Hopefully this trend of development will continue to be implemented.
Re: I need your opinion on how to understand this question
This is my essay after correction.
Any comments would be appreciated.
Cheers,
Chi
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Nowadays, in many countries, large shopping centers are built out of town where there is more space and property is not as pricy as in the center. These shopping complexes are great attractions as they contain a larger selection and a wide range of shops and products. Consequently, this makes people drive out of town and encourages people who do not yet own a car to buy one. Increase in car use is commonly marked with traffic and pollution problems, however I believe it is not always the case because it can actually resolve traffic problems and create more jobs in the car industry.
For one, having people drive to the outskirts of the cities helps spread out the traffic, hence reduce traffic congestion in the center. Let’s take Hanoi, a developing city in South East Asia which is similar to many other developing cities, as an example. In the last ten years, Hanoi had to deal with increasing traffic problems due to a dramatic rise in population. After building shopping centers on the outskirts of the city, the traffic has been considerably reduced in the city inner which is a great benefit of making people drive out of town for shopping.
In addition to this, increasing demand of cars is directly beneficial to the car industry and the economy due to the number of jobs it creates. Let’s go back to the example of Hanoi. Because of the increase in demand for cars, big car makers such as Toyota and Honda have established their factories in a nearby province which created thousands of jobs for young people who were unemployed. This exemplifies that moving the shopping centers to the city outskirts can lead to a positive effect for the society and the economy.
In summary, according to this view, it can be concluded that moving the complex shopping centers to the city outskirts which leads to increase in car ownership can simultaneously ease the traffic problem within the city and reduce unemployment. The positive nature of these benefits makes it clear that the advantages of this change by far outweigh the disadvantages that it might bring about. Hopefully this trend of development will continue to be implemented.
Any comments would be appreciated.
Cheers,
Chi
-------------------------------
Nowadays, in many countries, large shopping centers are built out of town where there is more space and property is not as pricy as in the center. These shopping complexes are great attractions as they contain a larger selection and a wide range of shops and products. Consequently, this makes people drive out of town and encourages people who do not yet own a car to buy one. Increase in car use is commonly marked with traffic and pollution problems, however I believe it is not always the case because it can actually resolve traffic problems and create more jobs in the car industry.
For one, having people drive to the outskirts of the cities helps spread out the traffic, hence reduce traffic congestion in the center. Let’s take Hanoi, a developing city in South East Asia which is similar to many other developing cities, as an example. In the last ten years, Hanoi had to deal with increasing traffic problems due to a dramatic rise in population. After building shopping centers on the outskirts of the city, the traffic has been considerably reduced in the city inner which is a great benefit of making people drive out of town for shopping.
In addition to this, increasing demand of cars is directly beneficial to the car industry and the economy due to the number of jobs it creates. Let’s go back to the example of Hanoi. Because of the increase in demand for cars, big car makers such as Toyota and Honda have established their factories in a nearby province which created thousands of jobs for young people who were unemployed. This exemplifies that moving the shopping centers to the city outskirts can lead to a positive effect for the society and the economy.
In summary, according to this view, it can be concluded that moving the complex shopping centers to the city outskirts which leads to increase in car ownership can simultaneously ease the traffic problem within the city and reduce unemployment. The positive nature of these benefits makes it clear that the advantages of this change by far outweigh the disadvantages that it might bring about. Hopefully this trend of development will continue to be implemented.