PLEASE evaluate my TASK 2:)
Posted: Sat Aug 08, 2015 1:43 am
Hi guys, here is an essay I wrote yesterday, would be much appreciate if you could provide your feedbacks! 
"Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. others believe that children who are taught to cooperate become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion."
Some people believe that competition among children should be encouraged, while others think that teaching them about cooperation is more important. I tend to agree with the latter and will elaborate my arguments below.
Admittedly, a competitive learning environment can keep children motivated to study hard and pursue their goals. Children with competitive awareness are more likely complete tasks efficiently and independently, which can help them to build self-confidence and to achieve their academic potential. Nevertheless, an excessively competitive studying environment may cause tensions and conflicts, and could result in unhealthy competition among children. Such environment may make children become aggressive and may lead to discipline problems.
I believe that knowing how to cooperate with others is more important for children. Having the ability to cooperate with other students is an essential factor of children's academic studies. Nowadays, more and more universities have introduced group assignments into their course outlines, requiring students to work in groups to complete different tasks. Encourage children to participate in group activities can help them to develop skills that important in academic study and research, such as interpersonal skills and team-building skills. Furthermore, cooperation skills play more important roles than competitive skills in children's future careers. For example, there are many group projects such as IT projects, that are often impossible to complete by individuals. It means that such projects need cooperation from different departments. This is the reason why employers value teamwork skills more than individual merit.
Overall, I personally believe cooperative environment offers more advantages than competitive one, and schools should always give priority to cooperative education because it can prepare children better for their future development.
Word count: 309
"Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. others believe that children who are taught to cooperate become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion."
Some people believe that competition among children should be encouraged, while others think that teaching them about cooperation is more important. I tend to agree with the latter and will elaborate my arguments below.
Admittedly, a competitive learning environment can keep children motivated to study hard and pursue their goals. Children with competitive awareness are more likely complete tasks efficiently and independently, which can help them to build self-confidence and to achieve their academic potential. Nevertheless, an excessively competitive studying environment may cause tensions and conflicts, and could result in unhealthy competition among children. Such environment may make children become aggressive and may lead to discipline problems.
I believe that knowing how to cooperate with others is more important for children. Having the ability to cooperate with other students is an essential factor of children's academic studies. Nowadays, more and more universities have introduced group assignments into their course outlines, requiring students to work in groups to complete different tasks. Encourage children to participate in group activities can help them to develop skills that important in academic study and research, such as interpersonal skills and team-building skills. Furthermore, cooperation skills play more important roles than competitive skills in children's future careers. For example, there are many group projects such as IT projects, that are often impossible to complete by individuals. It means that such projects need cooperation from different departments. This is the reason why employers value teamwork skills more than individual merit.
Overall, I personally believe cooperative environment offers more advantages than competitive one, and schools should always give priority to cooperative education because it can prepare children better for their future development.
Word count: 309