Could someone asses this writing task 1?

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
Post Reply
Ecro
Posts: 29
Joined: Sun Jul 19, 2015 6:34 am

Could someone asses this writing task 1?

Post by Ecro »

Image

The graph shows information about the consumption of sugar and honey and the possibility of tooth decay.

The PH level at which tooth decay is unlikely is 5.5. Below that it's quite possible to happen. The safest of three of them(fruit sugar, cane sugar and honey) is honey. That's because the PH level is falling only for 5 minutes to 4.7, when it stabilises for another 5, and it goes up to safety after 13 minutes in. While fruit sugar makes your PH levels decrease for only five minutes, too, its rise is slower than the one done by honey.

The most dangerous is cane sugar. It makes your PH level go down to 2.5, and it's crawling up very leisurely . Tooth decay is unlikely to occur only after 30 minutes! That's very slow compared to the others.

In conclusion, honey is the least likely to cause tooth decay, while the other two are more alarming.
User avatar
Flick
Grammar Checker
Grammar Checker
Posts: 1466
Joined: Mon Apr 21, 2014 10:06 pm

Re: Could someone asses this writing task 1?

Post by Flick »

Ecro wrote:[img]
The graph shows information about the consumption of sugar and honey and the possibility of tooth decay.(<--Reword to: "The graph shows the acid level in the mouth after consuming different types of sugar and honey, and how that relates to tooth decay.")

The PH level at which tooth decay is unlikely is 5.5. Below that, tooth decay is likely. The safest of three of them(fruit sugar, cane sugar and honey) is honey.(<--Reword to: "Of the three sugar and honey types, honey was the least likely to cause tooth decay.") That's because the PH level drops to 4.7 for about 5 minutes. It then stabilises for another 5 minutes, and returns to a higher PH level after 13 minutes. While fruit sugar makes your PH levels decrease for only five minutes, too, its rise is slower than honey.

The most dangerous is cane sugar. It makes your PH level drop to 2.5, and its rise to normal PH levels is much slower. Tooth decay is still likely to occur after 30 minutes! That's very slow compared to the others.

In conclusion, honey is the least likely to cause tooth decay, while the other two are more alarming.
Post Reply