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Please kindly assess my writing task 1 - I am targeting for Band 7.THANKS

Posted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 7:17 am
by jayani
The pie charts illustrate proportions of 5 types of fuel sources (coal, hydro power, nuclear power, oil and natural gas).consumed for the process of electricity generation in 1980 and 2000.

Overall, In Australia during both years coal was the key fuel source. Similarly, in France that is nuclear power. In 2000 compared to 1980 Australian and French total no of production units rose by 1.7 times and 2 times respectively. However Australia had not produced electricity using nuclear power as a source. By 2000 both Australian and French natural gas related production for electricity generation declined significantly. In France, production no of units by coal were almost consistent throughout both years.

With regards to Australia, by 1980 no of 50 electricity units were produced using coal and by 2000 it drastically rose up to 130 units. However in 2000 production of oil related electricity declined to 2 units from 10 .Followed by a 18 unit drop in natural gas related electricity generation by 2000 in comparison to 1980.Furthermore ,a marginal acceleration of 16 units were highlighted under hydropower.

Likewise in France,for both years coal related production units were experienced at a consistent level of 25 units .In contrast, the natural gas related units had a staggering decline in proportion from 25 to 2 units by2000 in comparison to 1980.In 2000 by generating 126 units as the key source, nuclear power initially contributed to only 15 units in 1980.

Re: Please kindly assess my writing task 1 - I am targeting for Band 7.THANKS

Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 3:11 am
by David.IELTS.Examiner
Hello!

The data has been described well, but there are quite a lot of grammar mistakes. Punctuation is also an issue. The use of 'no' instead of 'number' could be confusing.

All the best,
David