Now a days,a number of universities are accepting same number of students regardless of their gender in every subject and I agree to this approach.Let’s discuss this in detail below.
Human beings have been evolving the education system from a very long time.The evolution of education sector can be clearly seen in today’s modern schooling system.Now a days,a number of universities are accepting same number of students regardless of their gender in every subject and I agree to this approach.Let’s discuss this in detail below.
To begin with,providing the equal number of opportunities can help the male and female students to gain confidence to succeed in life.For example,choosing certain subjects of interest can help pupils to feel more motivated and progress in the field of studies they feel attracted to,this can help them to achieve what they dream for.This shows that giving everybody an equal chance to choose their curriculum can have a positive effect on their career.Thus, tertiary education systems should provide learners with same number of opportunities in all field of studies.
In addition to that,it is the basic right of every human being to learn what they desire for.To support this idea it is suggested that,according to human rights everybody is born equal and deserve the same in all fields of life.A discrimination in education department can have negative effects on the general population.Therefore,everyone should be allowed to choose the line of studies they wish for.This can help them to develop a sense of equality among general population.
In conclusion,institutions must allow everyone to study the curriculum they show interest towards and it is supported that this can prove to be benifical towards the students and it can also help them to pursue their ultimate goals in life.
261 words .Expert advice and please grade this essay out of 9 bands.
writing task 2
-
David.IELTS.Examiner
- IELTS Examiner
- Posts: 1371
- Joined: Tue May 05, 2015 4:34 am
Re: writing task 2
Hello!
Introduction - A number of universities? In every subject? I'm going to need an example, as I have never heard of this. A quick online search reveals no examples at all. Well, I guess even 1 is a number, but when we say 'a number of' it generally means quite a lot.
Main paragraph - You write about choosing the subjects they like, but this could be impossible. If 200 men want to be engineers, but only 100 women want to be engineers, 100 men are going to lose out. This example also negates the suggestion you make that everyone has an equal chance. They don't. In my example, which is not 'crazy', the women are guaranteed to get their choice, but the men only have a 50/50 chance.
The conclusion is actually unclear. Do you think that equal numbers of men and women should study all subjects or not?
Overall, the problems with grammar and vocabulary make this essay virtually impossible to understand. Arguments are either totally unclear or completely false.
A total rewrite is needed.
David
Introduction - A number of universities? In every subject? I'm going to need an example, as I have never heard of this. A quick online search reveals no examples at all. Well, I guess even 1 is a number, but when we say 'a number of' it generally means quite a lot.
Main paragraph - You write about choosing the subjects they like, but this could be impossible. If 200 men want to be engineers, but only 100 women want to be engineers, 100 men are going to lose out. This example also negates the suggestion you make that everyone has an equal chance. They don't. In my example, which is not 'crazy', the women are guaranteed to get their choice, but the men only have a 50/50 chance.
The conclusion is actually unclear. Do you think that equal numbers of men and women should study all subjects or not?
Overall, the problems with grammar and vocabulary make this essay virtually impossible to understand. Arguments are either totally unclear or completely false.
A total rewrite is needed.
David